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Just for laughs...corner
Rank: User Joined: 6/18/2009 Posts: 271
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Only Kenyans :-
1. Are engaged for 5 years or
more
2. Never bother to divorce, they
just separate
3. Are late to church, work, and
everything else, EXCEPT
when the disco is free before
9pm
4. Refer to diabetes as “SUGAR”
5. Show up at weddings,
showers, graduation,
birthday parties with a new
outfit on with nails and hair
done but no gift
6. In relation to #5, they eat
like parking boys and take a
plate home
7. Consider “clubbing” or
“henging” as a monthly
expense
8. Leave bills (instead of
insurance money) behind for
surviving relatives
9. Borrow money for a wedding
10. Have mothers who can use
curse words and religion
ALL IN ONE SENTENCE e.g.
“Lord, give me strength
because I’m about to knock
the hell out of this child
11. Spend the car insurance
money on everything EXCEPT
getting the dent fixed.
12. Invite co-workers and all
their friends to their child’s
1st birthday party which
happens to have a
professional DJ with only
about 3 kids (including the
child) in attendance. And
then expect the guests to
“changa” for the bash.
13. Start every sentences with
“Me I…” e.g. ME I donno
why you are saying that I
always say “Me I”.
14. Say “Spend” when they are
staying the night elsewhere
from home, e.g. “Are you
going to spend at her place?”
15. Put in iron rods in all
windows and main
doors….referring to themas
“Burglar proof”
16. Use “Ngai” as an exclamation
mark e.g. “Ngai, what are
you doing?”
17. Believe “Ati” is an English
word for “What?”
18. Think it is cool to drink and
drive and get away with it “I
don’t know how I got home
that day… the way I was soo
drunk!”
19. Think all their economic and
social problems are caused
by “Moi” when in fact some
have never been to school.
20. Pack up all their earthly
goods to go to “shaggs” for
a week in December, only to
pack them all back again
after one week and return to
“Tao”
21. Call travelling “flying out”
e.g. She flew out (no one
seems to wonder where all
these Kenyans fly to)
22. Think that taking clerical job
in a company is better and
“cooler” than toiling in their
parents’ family business.
23. Prefer washing cars and
dishes in USA to toiling in
their 20-acre tea farms in
Kenya.
24. Call their homes “at ours”.
e.g., “At ours, we eat Githeri
every day.
25. Complain for five years about
poor governance and
corruption then vote in the
same clowns back to
parliament.
26. Have a chief Justice who has
no law degree!
27. Go on strike for one day and
expect the gvt. to resign!
28. Sit back in their homes and
expect their MP to “brins
Development”
29. Refuse to insure against
anything and expect you to
bankroll them when calamity
strikes…. thro’ Harambee.
30. Sit calmly and sometimes
cheer as a mad man drives
them in a ramshackle at
breakneck speed to certain
death.
31. Drive with their windows Â
wound up when they get to
city centre because of 4-
year-old brats armed with
human feaces, and still claim
to be free people!
Sounds so true, eh?
I hope you are still Kenyan by All
standards!
Me, I am Kenyan Damu, but do I say!!
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/17/2008 Posts: 23,365 Location: Nairobi
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A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper, Guido, has cheated him out of $1,000,000. His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that Guido would hear nothing so he would never have to testify in court. When the Godfather goes to confront Guido about his missing $1 million, he takes along his lawyer who knows sign language. ... The Godfather tells the lawyer, "Ask him where's the money?" The lawyer, using sign language, asks Guido where's the money? Guido signs back, "I don't know what you are talking about" The lawyer tells the Godfather, "He says he doesn't know what you're talking about." The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to Guido's temple and says, "Ask him again!" The lawyer signs to Guido, "He'll kill you if you don't tell him.." Guido signs back, "OK.!!!! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed at my cousin Bruno's house." The Godfather asks the lawyer, "What did he say?" The lawyer replies, " He says you don't have the guts to pull the trigger." ..."Wewe ni mtu mdogo sana....na mwenye amekuandika pia ni mtu mdogo sana!".
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 11/17/2012 Posts: 1,461 Location: Ngong Forest
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McReggae wrote:A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper, Guido, has cheated him out of $1,000,000.
His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that Guido would hear nothing so he would never have to testify in court.
When the Godfather goes to confront Guido about his missing $1 million, he takes along his lawyer who knows sign language.
...
The Godfather tells the lawyer, "Ask him where's the money?"
The lawyer, using sign language, asks Guido where's the money?
Guido signs back, "I don't know what you are talking about"
The lawyer tells the Godfather, "He says he doesn't know what you're talking about."
The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to Guido's temple and says, "Ask him again!"
The lawyer signs to Guido, "He'll kill you if you don't tell him.."
Guido signs back, "OK.!!!! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed at my cousin Bruno's house."
The Godfather asks the lawyer, "What did he say?"
The lawyer replies, " He says you don't have the guts to pull the trigger."  Nice one,is it opportunity or taking advantage.
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Rank: Member Joined: 9/9/2010 Posts: 784 Location: ant hill - red hill
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This is good... http://www.youtube.com/w...ature=endscreen&NR=1The greatest act of bravery is chancing a fart while suffering from diarrhoea
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/2/2009 Posts: 26,325 Location: Masada
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McReggae wrote:A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper, Guido, has cheated him out of $1,000,000.
His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that Guido would hear nothing so he would never have to testify in court.
When the Godfather goes to confront Guido about his missing $1 million, he takes along his lawyer who knows sign language.
...
The Godfather tells the lawyer, "Ask him where's the money?"
The lawyer, using sign language, asks Guido where's the money?
Guido signs back, "I don't know what you are talking about"
The lawyer tells the Godfather, "He says he doesn't know what you're talking about."
The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to Guido's temple and says, "Ask him again!"
The lawyer signs to Guido, "He'll kill you if you don't tell him.."
Guido signs back, "OK.!!!! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed at my cousin Bruno's house."
The Godfather asks the lawyer, "What did he say?"
The lawyer replies, " He says you don't have the guts to pull the trigger." Twaf!!!  Portfolio: Sold
You know you've made it when you get a parking space for your yatcht.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/2/2009 Posts: 26,325 Location: Masada
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Ngong wrote:vinii wrote:Just for gags ''Othaya erections were hard and took long. But i came on top of Mugambi...." ...Wambui  hahahahaaaaa! They were also stiff. Portfolio: Sold
You know you've made it when you get a parking space for your yatcht.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/23/2009 Posts: 1,626
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Hell, back in 1990, the Government seized the Mustang Ranch brothel in Nevada for tax evasion and, as required by law, tried to run it. They failed and it closed. Now we are trusting the economy of our country and our banking system to the same nit-wits who couldn't make money running a whore house and selling whiskey! Uncertainty is certain.Let go
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/23/2009 Posts: 1,626
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A teacher is using the "scientific method" to teach the class about evolution... TEACHER: Tommy do you see the tree outside? TOMMY: Yes. TEACHER: Tommy, do you see the grass outside? TOMMY: Yes. TEACHER: Go outside and look up and see if you can see the sky. TOMMY: Okay. (He returned a few minutes later) Yes, I saw the sky. TEACHER: Did you see God? TOMMY: No. TEACHER: That's my point. We can't see God because he isn't there. He doesn't exist. A little girl spoke up and wanted to ask the boy some questions. The teacher agreed and the little girl questioned the boy. LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the tree outside? TOMMY: Yes. LITTLE GIRL: Tommy do you see the grass outside? TOMMY: Yessssss (getting tired of the questions this time). LITTLE GIRL: Did you see the sky? TOMMY: Yessssss. LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the teacher? TOMMY: Yes LITTLE GIRL: Do you see the teacher's mind? TOMMY: No. LITTLE GIRL: Then according to what we were taught today in school, she must not have one! Uncertainty is certain.Let go
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/2/2011 Posts: 4,818 Location: -1.2107, 36.8831
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#STOLEN Actually there is a V and a D in Valentines Day ... Ni kama Vindio! Receive with simplicity everything that happens to you.” ― Rashi
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Rank: Member Joined: 2/24/2010 Posts: 637 Location: Nairobi
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Copy &Paste LETTER TO MY New BOYFRIEND! by Dol Phine on Saturday, February 9, 2013 at 4:35pm · Hi Boy, I am glad Ur ma boy...U'v brought sunshine in ma lyf,happiness,joy and comfort...I am sooo thankful I found You! However,there are a couple thngs I want to say here: .I have a reason AS TO WHY I am asking you for full details about Your Ex- galfriends and past relationshps. I dont care how many bitches you'v banged before,I DONT even care whether the number is higher than Jimnah Mbaru's certificates. I just want to know them ALL so that I can add them ALL to my "TO KILL LIST". I want to know them ALL so that I can know what kind of shit to expect and from Who. It doesnt matter how MANY they are. I am cool with that. I mean,I DONT have a problem with You. I have a problem with THEM! .I am a woman. Having a temper is as normal as your pre-mature ejaculations... Thats Me,A WOMAN. I can have over 62 tempers per minute. Deal with It. .I appreciate a phone call.Every now and then! Quit texting me like the IEBC! If I can remember right,the last time You called Me,Martha Karua was still the Minister for Justice! Hey,BE A MAN! Grab that phone and CALL ME! I am your girlfriend,NOT YOUR Aunt! .YOU SHOULD NEVER BE FRIENDS with ANY of your Ex-girlfriends! I should NEVER catch you helping her buy underwears in Kariokor! Have You ever seen RUTO in a CORD rally? A BREAK-UP is a BREAK-UP ,END OF STORY! .I LOVE COMPLIMENTS! When I buy a new dress,YOU SHOULD NOTICE! Its clearly written in the Female Constitution. And NOT just noticing,YOU should exclaim and tell me I look amazing! It doesnt matter whether I actually look like a robbery- with-violence survivor! According to You,I SHOULD LOOK AWESOME! .You should REMIND me am beautiful every DAY! Thats Not a request. Its Your Duty!!! .Kiss Me like a Queen! Stop kissing Me like you are administering First Aid to Me! Relax! Breath In,Breathe Out. Then gently,tilt tha head,get closer then kiss me like a Princess! You are DEALING with lips here,Not pizza! .Before you have me,Before You can do it to Me,Before we can have sex, I expect a thorough,arousing foreplay! You dont just jump on me and start humping me like a Rhino! You are dealing with a woman here,Not a crime suspect! Take Your time,hold me,touch me,tease Me,caress me...squeeze me...I have to get myself ready for action,SO STOP jumping into Me like a suicide bomber! .If You insist on working on my beautiful boobs,then do it like a pro! Not eating them up like Pokot hunger victims! Hey,RELAX! You are dealing with boobs here,Not a wedding buffet! .NO BITCH should text You past 10pm ! What does she want? Air ????? .I wont worry about the size f ua D ! BUT YOU better know what to do with that D! Am supposed to enjoy EVERY minute of the action! Be innovative,Be creative! Bang Me like a pornstar! Am supposed to be sweating and screaming and shaking! If am NOT doing that,GO HOME and watch Tahidi High! .I MUST NOT Orgasm. BUT I wil appreciate IF I DO! Also,Its a crime to cum soooo fast! Nigga please,TAKE YOUR TIME! Not unless you are handling stolen property! .I will put up with Your 'Boys'. Am ready to be friends with them too. BUT if they start behaving like assholes,THINGS WILL CHANGE! They are supposed to be human beings,so they should ACT like human beings! This is NOT Amboseli National Park! Tell Your Boys to behave!!!! .I know You love sex but AM SORRY, If AM NOT WILLING. AM NOT WILLING! I shouldnt just sit there and part my legs for you anytime,anywhere! Who are You?? A tampon??? Relax Nigga! Pussy aint going nowhere! .I love laughing . So,I'd appreciate funny stories and jokes frm You every now and then! Being boring is a CRIME! Hey,You are My Boyfriend,Not Cyrus Jirongo! .About Finances,I am Ok with you when You have ca$h and when you may NOT have. However,YOU DONT HAVE to be broke,Everyday,Every month,All Year! Otherwise,You might as well sell your wallet and buy a notebook~~~to be writting down Your problems! .I AM ALWAYS RIGHT. Thats Me,A WOMAN! I should start AND END every argument. And You are NOT supposed to TALK during the argument,You are supposed to SIT there,ADMIT your mistakes,AGREE with Me,NOD your head,FEEL sorry AND continue eating your cabbages! I call the shots here! I am a WOMAN! I have the PUSSY,So I make the Rules! If You also want to MAKE rules,join the Constitution Implementation Commission. Love, Girlfriend. The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/11/2007 Posts: 1,680 Location: nairobi
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[quote=safariant]This is good... http://www.youtube.com/w...ture=endscreen&NR=1[/quote] .. .... ...... ........WHICH PART?
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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LOL...... Eti Obako has saved the names of the presidential candidates on his cell as 1. Muite wa MAITHO 2.P.K Wa Boro ngamu 3. Dida kaguruki 4. Raila wa Tendawiri 5.Martha - wa Mugunda 6.Mudavadi makai momo 7.Uhuru wa maitho ichinga 8.Ole kiyiapi wa magego!
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/2/2011 Posts: 4,818 Location: -1.2107, 36.8831
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washiku wrote:LOL...... Eti Obako has saved the names of the presidential candidates on his cell as
1. Muite wa MAITHO
2.P.K Wa Boro ngamu
3. Dida kaguruki
4. Raila wa Tendawiri
5.Martha - wa Mugunda
6.Mudavadi makai momo
7.Uhuru wa maitho ichinga
8.Ole kiyiapi wa magego! Let me volunteer to translate, and i hope @Admin won't in any way victimize me for doing that: 1. Muite the 'macho/eyes' 2. P.K the Chewing Gum 3. Dida the mad man 4. Raila wa vitendawili 5. (I don't want to go to jail) 6. Mudavadi the hard cheeks 7. Uhuru the red hot eyes 8. Kiyapi the teeth guy Receive with simplicity everything that happens to you.” ― Rashi
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Rank: Member Joined: 4/30/2010 Posts: 241
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after yesterdays debate my vote is likely JOK, hizo gaps haziwezi kula pesa ya umma. ukiona choo kwa ndoto usiingie, ni mtego!
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Rank: Member Joined: 8/27/2012 Posts: 320
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keraka wrote:Copy &Paste
LETTER TO MY New BOYFRIEND!
by Dol Phine on Saturday, February 9, 2013 at 4:35pm ·
Hi Boy,
I am glad Ur ma boy...U'v brought sunshine in ma lyf,happiness,joy and comfort...I am sooo thankful I found You!
However,there are a couple thngs I want to say here:
.I have a reason AS TO WHY I am asking you for full details about Your Ex- galfriends and past relationshps.
I dont care how many bitches you'v banged before,I DONT even care whether the number is higher than
Jimnah Mbaru's certificates.
I just want to know them ALL so that I can add them ALL to my "TO KILL LIST". I want
to know them ALL so that I can know what kind of shit to expect and from Who. It doesnt matter how MANY they are.
I am cool with that. I mean,I DONT have a problem with You. I have a problem with THEM!
.I am a woman. Having a temper is as normal as your pre-mature ejaculations... Thats Me,A WOMAN. I can have over 62 tempers per minute.
Deal with It.
.I appreciate a phone call.Every now and then! Quit texting me like the IEBC! If I can remember right,the last
time You called Me,Martha Karua was still the Minister for Justice!
Hey,BE A MAN! Grab that phone and CALL ME! I
am your girlfriend,NOT YOUR Aunt!
.YOU SHOULD NEVER BE FRIENDS with ANY of your Ex-girlfriends! I should NEVER catch you helping her buy
underwears in Kariokor!
Have You ever seen RUTO in a CORD rally?
A BREAK-UP is a BREAK-UP ,END OF STORY!
.I LOVE COMPLIMENTS! When I buy a new dress,YOU SHOULD NOTICE! Its clearly written in the Female Constitution. And NOT just noticing,YOU should exclaim and tell me I look amazing! It doesnt matter
whether I actually look like a robbery- with-violence survivor! According to
You,I SHOULD LOOK AWESOME!
.You should REMIND me am beautiful every DAY! Thats Not a request. Its Your Duty!!!
.Kiss Me like a Queen! Stop kissing Me like you are administering First Aid to
Me! Relax! Breath In,Breathe Out.
Then gently,tilt tha head,get closer then kiss me like a Princess!
You are DEALING with lips here,Not pizza!
.Before you have me,Before You can do it to Me,Before we can have sex, I expect a thorough,arousing foreplay!
You dont just jump on me and start humping me like a Rhino! You are dealing with a woman here,Not a
crime suspect! Take Your time,hold me,touch me,tease Me,caress me...squeeze me...I have to get myself
ready for action,SO STOP jumping into Me like a suicide bomber!
.If You insist on working on my beautiful boobs,then do it like a pro!
Not eating them up like Pokot hunger victims! Hey,RELAX! You are dealing with boobs here,Not a wedding buffet!
.NO BITCH should text You past 10pm !
What does she want? Air ?????
.I wont worry about the size f ua D !
BUT YOU better know what to do with that D!
Am supposed to enjoy EVERY
minute of the action! Be
innovative,Be creative! Bang Me like a pornstar! Am supposed to be sweating and screaming and shaking!
If am NOT doing that,GO HOME and watch Tahidi High!
.I MUST NOT Orgasm. BUT I wil appreciate IF I DO!
Also,Its a crime to cum soooo fast! Nigga please,TAKE
YOUR TIME! Not unless you are handling stolen property!
.I will put up with Your 'Boys'. Am ready to be friends with them too.
BUT if they start behaving like
assholes,THINGS WILL CHANGE! They are supposed to be human beings,so
they should ACT like human beings!
This is NOT Amboseli National Park!
Tell Your Boys to behave!!!!
.I know You love sex but AM SORRY,
If AM NOT WILLING. AM NOT WILLING!
I shouldnt just sit there and part my legs for you anytime,anywhere!
Who are You?? A tampon??? Relax Nigga!
Pussy aint going nowhere!
.I love laughing . So,I'd appreciate funny stories and jokes frm You every now and then!
Being boring is a CRIME! Hey,You are My Boyfriend,Not
Cyrus Jirongo!
.About Finances,I am Ok with you when You have ca$h and when you may NOT have. However,YOU DONT HAVE to be broke,Everyday,Every
month,All Year! Otherwise,You might
as well sell your wallet and buy a notebook~~~to be writting down Your problems!
.I AM ALWAYS RIGHT. Thats Me,A WOMAN! I should start AND END every argument. And You are NOT supposed
to TALK during the argument,You are supposed to SIT there,ADMIT your
mistakes,AGREE with Me,NOD your head,FEEL sorry AND continue eating your cabbages!
I call the shots here!
I am a WOMAN!
I have the PUSSY,So I make the Rules!
If You also want to MAKE rules,join the
Constitution Implementation
Commission.
Love,
Girlfriend. @keraka, you are kiraka just like yourself. copy and paste are not funny. Light Bearer
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 11/26/2008 Posts: 745
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#Stolen Presidential Debate?
Julie : Why did THE CHICKEN cross the road??
DIDA: Its about time we started teaching Chicken the values of NOT crossing roads. Its better to stay on one side of the road than the other. Suppose it was knocked down by a speeding car! What would it have said? Thats the kind of Chicken that would vote for Waititu.
KIYAPI: It depends with WHERE the chicken was going. Crossing the road is NOT the end of the story. I resigned from the Education Ministry to fight for therights of Everyone! Chickens included! If a chicken wants to cross the road,let it cross the road! Thats what my party RBK stands for!
UHURU: The JUBILEE government will ensure a 24-hour Economy where a chicken will NOT have to cross ANY road in search for jobs.I will create jobs right where the chicken is standing...And the ONLY time a chicken leaves the work station,is maybe when its going to answer charges at the ICC.
KENNETH: I was born in Bahati. We used to call it,"Bahaa....." ,I went to Starehe,where we used to each chicken every weekend. And am sorry,I think we ate that chicken too.Anyway,dont worry, My Government will create another chicken within the first 100 days...
MUDAVADI: Did YOU mention a CHICKEN?? Julie Gichuru,did You JUST mention a chicken?? Wait,Is that chicken here??! Am sorry butI think we are NOT supposed to be discussing a chicken. We should be EATING it!
KARUA: I believe in Integrity. I pushed so hard for that chicken to stay ON one side of the road. But the two principals failed to convince their troops to stop the chicken from crossing. The constitution is clear on the role ofchickens. And My government willNOT only bring back the chicken,Iwil also close down that road!
RAILA: Chickens are just chickens.That is the kind of chicken that owns huge tracts of land on the other side of the road! As a chicken,I believe You should stay in one place! Not crossing roads every now and then! You cant lay eggs through Skype.
MUITE: The Safina Government will get down to the bottom of the matter! You cannot convince Me,or any rational Kenyan,that that chicken was acting alone! NO! That chicken must have beensent by other chickens! You cannot tell me that other chickenswere NOT aware that that chicken was crossing the road! Ofcourse they were! And am NOT holding brief for that chicken,but My Government will investigate the matter and include more chickens in this whole 'Road-Crossing' Scandal!
*Julie collapses on Kaikai's thighs*
*Kaikai gets an erection*
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/23/2009 Posts: 1,626
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brav wrote:#Stolen Presidential Debate?
Julie : Why did THE CHICKEN cross the road??
DIDA: Its about time we started teaching Chicken the values of NOT crossing roads. Its better to stay on one side of the road than the other. Suppose it was knocked down by a speeding car! What would it have said? Thats the kind of Chicken that would vote for Waititu.
KIYAPI: It depends with WHERE the chicken was going. Crossing the road is NOT the end of the story. I resigned from the Education Ministry to fight for therights of Everyone! Chickens included! If a chicken wants to cross the road,let it cross the road! Thats what my party RBK stands for!
UHURU: The JUBILEE government will ensure a 24-hour Economy where a chicken will NOT have to cross ANY road in search for jobs.I will create jobs right where the chicken is standing...And the ONLY time a chicken leaves the work station,is maybe when its going to answer charges at the ICC.
KENNETH: I was born in Bahati. We used to call it,"Bahaa....." ,I went to Starehe,where we used to each chicken every weekend. And am sorry,I think we ate that chicken too.Anyway,dont worry, My Government will create another chicken within the first 100 days...
MUDAVADI: Did YOU mention a CHICKEN?? Julie Gichuru,did You JUST mention a chicken?? Wait,Is that chicken here??! Am sorry butI think we are NOT supposed to be discussing a chicken. We should be EATING it!
KARUA: I believe in Integrity. I pushed so hard for that chicken to stay ON one side of the road. But the two principals failed to convince their troops to stop the chicken from crossing. The constitution is clear on the role ofchickens. And My government willNOT only bring back the chicken,Iwil also close down that road!
RAILA: Chickens are just chickens.That is the kind of chicken that owns huge tracts of land on the other side of the road! As a chicken,I believe You should stay in one place! Not crossing roads every now and then! You cant lay eggs through Skype.
MUITE: The Safina Government will get down to the bottom of the matter! You cannot convince Me,or any rational Kenyan,that that chicken was acting alone! NO! That chicken must have beensent by other chickens! You cannot tell me that other chickenswere NOT aware that that chicken was crossing the road! Ofcourse they were! And am NOT holding brief for that chicken,but My Government will investigate the matter and include more chickens in this whole 'Road-Crossing' Scandal!
*Julie collapses on Kaikai's thighs*
*Kaikai gets an erection* Uncertainty is certain.Let go
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/2/2011 Posts: 4,818 Location: -1.2107, 36.8831
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#STOLEN Julie : Why did THE CHICKEN cross the road?? DIDA: Its about time we started teaching Chicken the values of NOT crossing roads. Its better to stay on one side of the road than the other. Suppose it was knocked down by a speeding car! What would it have said? Thats the kind of Chicken that would vote for Waititu. KIYAPI: It depends with WHERE the chicken was going. Crossing the road is NOT the end of the story. I resigned from the Education Ministry to fight for the rights of Everyone! Chickens included! If a chicken wants to cross the road,let it cross the road! Thats what my party RBK stands for! UHURU: The JUBILEE government will ensure a 24-hour Economy where a chicken will NOT have to cross ANY road in search for jobs. I will create jobs right where the chicken is standing...And the ONLY time a chicken leaves the work station,is maybe when its going to answer charges at the ICC. KENNETH: I was born in Bahati. We used to call it,"Bahaa....." ,I went to Starehe,where we used to eat chicken every weekend. And am sorry,I think we ate that chicken too.Anyway,dont worry, My Government will create another chicken within the first 100 days... MUDAVADI: Did YOU mention a CHICKEN?? Julie Gichuru,did You JUST mention a chicken?? Wait,Is that chicken here??! Am sorry but I think we are NOT supposed to be discussing a chicken. We should be EATING it! KARUA: I believe in Integrity. I pushed so hard for that chicken to stay ON one side of the road. But the two principals failed to convince their troops to stop the chicken from crossing. The constitution is clear on the role of chickens. And My government will NOT only bring back the chicken,I wil also close down that road! RAILA: Chickens are just chickens. That is the kind of chicken that owns huge tracts of land on the other side of the road! As a chicken,I believe You should stay in one place! Not crossing roads every now and then! You cant lay eggs through Skype. MUITE: The Safina Government will get down to the bottom of the matter! You cannot convince Me,or any rational Kenyan,that that chicken was acting alone! NO! That chicken must have been sent by other chickens! You cannot tell me that other chickens were NOT aware that that chicken was crossing the road! Of course they were! And am NOT holding brief for that chicken,but My Government will investigate the matter and include more chickens in this whole 'Road-Crossing' Scandal! Receive with simplicity everything that happens to you.” ― Rashi
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 2/25/2009 Posts: 973
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Borrowed: Its the beginning of lent so expect your kiuk landlord to come knocking at your door very soon. Call the coroner! #dead#
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Rank: New-farer Joined: 8/18/2011 Posts: 85
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Copy & Paste KCSE EXAM LEAKAGE!!! Forget about hizo zingine...! This is the mother of all KCSE exam leakages!!!! Hayaa twende....... calculate the speed of a poor guy to an Mpesa shop if he received money from a wrong number given that he hasn't paid his rent Bonoko-deh and Mbusi-deh have no CVs yet they're journalists. Discuss why U have a degree and still jobless calculate the momentum of a stone thrown by a Gor fan in relation to waititu's projectile principle If Wamalwa wins presidency, the head of the coin will no longer be flat. Explain Maths pp1...mwende is paid 5000 to tilt her mouth for an hr...calculate hw much kiraitu is paid which one of the followin is nt part of kenya?(rongai,kisimayu,ngamia one,Pwani) kiswahili paper 1: Kwenye picha ya Ole Kiyapi uliyopewa, jaza pengo." Which is wider the Gap between Kiyapis Teeth or the Gap between the rich and the poor? calculate the concentration of sugar in the 'utamu wa Yesu' song The road to heaven is narrow. Calculate the probability of a momo fitting on the path? Your Vitz has stalled. What is the probability that you're stuck on a chewing gum? using examples explain why luhyas cannot be employed at Kenchic Don't limit your challenges, but challenge your limits
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