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Just for laughs...corner
Rank: Elder Joined: 5/1/2010 Posts: 3,024 Location: Hapa
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Back in the day when you'd accidentally break a glass your mum would shout "Vunja zote!!! Hata zenye ziko kwa kabati toa uvunje!!"...but when it was the other way round and she'd be the one who broke the glass, she'd mumble "Nani ameweka glass hapa sasa?"  Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. - Muhammad Ali🐝
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Rank: Elder Joined: 5/21/2013 Posts: 2,841 Location: Here
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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I vividly remember those days.
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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QUESTIONS WELL ANSWERED... Q: Unaenda tao na hii mvua? A: Hapana naenda na ile ingine. Q: kwani umesuka nywele? A: Hapana nimechange kichwa. Q: kwani gari imeanguka? A: Hapana ni dere amepack upside down. Q: How was üa night? A: Sijui nilikuwa nimelala. Q: Hio gazeti ni ya leo? A: Hapana ni yangu. Q:(HOD)...umemwona prefect? A:(stude)...Hapana sikuwa namtafuta. Q: News za leo zinasemaje? A: Sijui sijaongea nazo...
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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A man came back from church and lifted his wife up....., the wife wondered & said "honey this is new" you've not done this before this shows you 're loving me the more......The man replied, "our pastor said we should lift our problems to GOD".....
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/19/2008 Posts: 4,268
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washiku wrote:
A man came back from church and lifted his wife up....., the wife wondered & said "honey this is new" you've not done this before this shows you 're loving me the more......The man replied, "our pastor said we should lift our problems to GOD".....
When is the burial?
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Rank: Member Joined: 6/22/2011 Posts: 561 Location: House
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Wendz wrote:washiku wrote:
A man came back from church and lifted his wife up....., the wife wondered & said "honey this is new" you've not done this before this shows you 're loving me the more......The man replied, "our pastor said we should lift our problems to GOD".....
When is the burial? this one and the one by Atalaku on introducing your wife to MWK can lead to makueni
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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Heri jina yako ikuwe Kwa bottle ya coke kuliko certificate ya Nairobi Aviation ukieka simu flight mode unapewa degree ya aviation You breath the Air around Nairobi Aviation College and you become a Air hostess Ati ukitoka rongai hadi Nairobi aviation unapewa masters in tourism and management Ati mkifanya grup discussion unapewa digri in mass comm Ati nairobi aviation ukilipa fees na mpesa unapewa diploma in banking Ukiumwa na tumbo uwanze kuendesha unapewa driving license Ukishout thitimaaa unapewa diploma in electrical engineering Aviation ukizuia watu wawili wakifight unapewa masters in disaster management Na ukiwasha bluetooth unapewa degree ya IT
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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Ati Una ukikuyu mob hadi ukiulizwa ni saa ngapi unasema 'ni saa tano lakini kwa sababu wewe ni customer yangu ntakufanyia 10:45
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Rank: Member Joined: 7/1/2014 Posts: 895 Location: sky
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washiku wrote:
A man came back from church and lifted his wife up....., the wife wondered & said "honey this is new" you've not done this before this shows you 're loving me the more......The man replied, "our pastor said we should lift our problems to GOD".....
There are only two emotions in the stock market, fear and hope. The problem is, you hope when you should fear and fear when you should hope
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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Chizi mmoja kapelekwa mathare. Doctor kamuuliza, "wajisikiaje?" yeye kajibu, "kila usiku naota nyani wanacheza football". Doctor akamjibu, "nitakupa dawa, leo hutaota tena". Chizi akadai, "heri unipe kesho. leo wanacheza fainali.
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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7 reasons men give when they want a BREAK-UP: 1. You don't even respect me,I'm talking and you are busy breathing? It's over! 2. So now your drinking coke that has another man's name on it, better go and find him cause it's over between us. 3. So Beyonce's "Drunk in love" is your caller tune? I can't trust alcoholics with my future kids. 4. I called you and you picked up immediately. You lack patience. 5. "You are always abbreviating your texts, you want our children to be short ? It's OVER. 6. I told u I love my food hot but you refused to warm the ice cream. You don't care about me. It's over. 7. You don't pay your tithe, if you can cheat on God, then who am I? We are done!
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Rank: Member Joined: 7/1/2014 Posts: 895 Location: sky
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washiku wrote:7 reasons men give when they want a BREAK-UP:
1. You don't even respect me,I'm talking and you are busy breathing? It's over!
2. So now your drinking coke that has another man's name on it, better go and find him cause it's over between us.
3. So Beyonce's "Drunk in love" is your caller tune? I can't trust alcoholics with my future kids.
4. I called you and you picked up immediately. You lack patience.
5. "You are always abbreviating your texts, you want our children to be short ? It's OVER.
6. I told u I love my food hot but you refused to warm the ice cream. You don't care about me. It's over.
7. You don't pay your tithe, if you can cheat on God, then who am I? We are done! There are only two emotions in the stock market, fear and hope. The problem is, you hope when you should fear and fear when you should hope
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Rank: Elder Joined: 7/11/2012 Posts: 5,222
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littledove wrote:washiku wrote:7 reasons men give when they want a BREAK-UP:
1. You don't even respect me,I'm talking and you are busy breathing? It's over!
2. So now your drinking coke that has another man's name on it, better go and find him cause it's over between us.
3. So Beyonce's "Drunk in love" is your caller tune? I can't trust alcoholics with my future kids.
4. I called you and you picked up immediately. You lack patience.
5. "You are always abbreviating your texts, you want our children to be short ? It's OVER.
6. I told u I love my food hot but you refused to warm the ice cream. You don't care about me. It's over.
7. You don't pay your tithe, if you can cheat on God, then who am I? We are done!
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 11/17/2012 Posts: 1,461 Location: Ngong Forest
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Rank: Member Joined: 9/30/2013 Posts: 659
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C&P  If you stay ready, no need to get ready.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/2/2009 Posts: 26,325 Location: Masada
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Pedes wrote:C&P Good ol' days!  Portfolio: Sold
You know you've made it when you get a parking space for your yatcht.
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Rank: Member Joined: 1/7/2015 Posts: 125
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4lourBliss wrote:Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?" "None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away." "Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you're thinking." Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?" "Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone." "No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking." FEAR GOD
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