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One for Wednesday....
The Real Shaft
#1 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:17:00 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/19/2008
Posts: 839
A fellow suspected that his wife ws cheating on him....

so he hired the only detective he could get... a Chinese PI...

After two days of scouting he got the following report...

Most honourable sir,

You leave house... i watch house....He come to house... He and She leave house,...

I follow he and she.... He and She walk into Hotel... I climb tree... I look through window...

He kiss She... She kiss he back.....She strip he... He strip She... He play with She..

She play with He...

I play with Me...

Me fall off tree...

I no see....

No fee...

Ding Lee



I'm the real Massey F.....shut your mouth
I'm the real Massey Fergu...... Shut your mouth....
Njunge
#2 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:24:00 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/7/2007
Posts: 11,935
Location: Nairobi
@Burekenge,
It must be a very slow Wednesday........Mbuzi imekula nyasi?

Old man about town....
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
The Real Shaft
#3 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:29:00 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/19/2008
Posts: 839
too slow...

wish the world was moving at my pace...

now I have to sit and wait for the world to catch up....

most boring...

mbuzi zimekula nyasi ya kutosha....


I'm the real Massey F.....shut your mouth
I'm the real Massey Fergu...... Shut your mouth....
Njunge
#4 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:32:00 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/7/2007
Posts: 11,935
Location: Nairobi
Bas......lala chini ya muti..........Si usingizi ni bure?...lol.

Old man about town....
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
The Real Shaft
#5 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:33:00 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/19/2008
Posts: 839
ningojee maembe yaanguke chini...???

I'm the real Massey F.....shut your mouth
I'm the real Massey Fergu...... Shut your mouth....
Njunge
#6 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:36:00 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/7/2007
Posts: 11,935
Location: Nairobi
Nyama choma na maembe.......Si utanyamba sana?

Old man about town....
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
Achiever
#7 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:36:00 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 5/12/2009
Posts: 152
guka...you r nuts..!!!......but i will take him a blanket

shaft...

the other one really touched me...-:)


don't worry....be happy
The Real Shaft
#8 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:37:00 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/19/2008
Posts: 839
blanketi...

sina haja...

my kondoos are knitting sweaters and shawls.....


I'm the real Massey F.....shut your mouth
I'm the real Massey Fergu...... Shut your mouth....
Njunge
#9 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:44:00 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/7/2007
Posts: 11,935
Location: Nairobi
Ole Polos hakuna haja ya blanketi........Lakini uvae suruali.We do not want to see you in tommorrow's dailys.

Old man about town....
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
The Real Shaft
#10 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:48:00 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/19/2008
Posts: 839
sasa..

ukiendelea kuvaa nappies....

hata saa hii....

utapata kijana kweli....

wacha zipate baridi kidogo....


I'm the real Massey F.....shut your mouth
I'm the real Massey Fergu...... Shut your mouth....
Njunge
#11 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:54:00 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/7/2007
Posts: 11,935
Location: Nairobi
Don't say it aloud......There was this Odiero who was car-jacked,stripped and tied to a tree out there........a stray month old dik dik finds him and decide to suckle the jungu's third leg.......chunga.

Old man about town....
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
mtaalam
#12 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 9:05:00 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 11/2/2006
Posts: 519
Ha...ha... sorry to spoil the somber mood but that made me laugh... somewhat...
Here's a forward I found interesting maybe you've received it,maybe not...

English spelling simplified

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German,which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations,the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English'. In the first year,'s' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly,this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion,and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter. In the 3rd year,publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also,al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'. During ze fifz yer,ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer,ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru! Und efter ze fifz yer,ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

Bright and interesting people talk about ideas. Those of average intelligence talk about things. Stupid people talk about other people.
Achiever
#13 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 9:11:00 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 5/12/2009
Posts: 152
@guka

i can only hope he said thanks...

i mean ...such a service ....at no fee....!!..


don't worry....be happy
The Real Shaft
#14 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 9:11:00 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/19/2008
Posts: 839
ze enklsh...

very komplikated...


I'm the real Massey F.....shut your mouth
I'm the real Massey Fergu...... Shut your mouth....
Sasha
#15 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 9:20:00 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 9/5/2007
Posts: 627
Nataka hii glue mnavuta! I'm too sober for such a slow day!

Immorality: The morality of those who are having a better time!
Njunge
#16 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 9:26:00 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/7/2007
Posts: 11,935
Location: Nairobi
@Achi,
His only weapon was .................'ssssshhhhhhh wewe......'...and if it was me i would have added,'Ii gatiathi ni gekunyonga'....-:)

Old man about town....
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
Shak
#17 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 10:07:00 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/22/2009
Posts: 2,449
Location: Africa
@ mtaalam,too funny and creative. At some point i had no idea what i was reading

smile
wanyuru
#18 Posted : Wednesday, November 04, 2009 10:36:00 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/29/2007
Posts: 948
@ guka. can only hope the 'gatiathi' didn't decide to eat chips.

Yes am a slow walker,but i never walk backwards.(anonymous)
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