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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/8/2013 Posts: 2,517
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Just wear clean underwear this one had me fetched from the floor... By the way do Wazuans go for the prostate screening? "šš”KQ makes money for everyone except the shareholder šš " overheard in Wazua
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Rank: User Joined: 8/15/2013 Posts: 13,236 Location: Vacuum
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We don't, we ejaculate frequently either by landing or jerking! Quote:Scared because you have never had a finger up your anus before, leave alone another manās finger. Of course there was always that odd freaky ex who suddenly put a finger in there during the migwatos and you had jumped up bewildered, āWhat the hell is that all about, Flora!! Quote:ou suddenly notice, with alarm, how thick his fingers are. I mean, if Floraās finger freaked you out like that, this finger will certainly get you pregnant! You study his nails. They are kind of long. What if they poke through the gloves and severe an artery in your rectum and you bleed to death in that room? Will he be fingered for malpractice? You wonder Quote:Then with even more apprehension you ask yourself, OK, what if I end up liking it? There are tales of men going for prostate examination and getting aroused. What does that mean? Wait, do you even want to know what that means? And what if that experience stays in your mind long after you have gone home? In traffic? As you buy juice? As you shower? What if you wonāt be able to think about anything but how it felt? Does that suddenly change your sexuality? Will you be able to look at another finger and wonder Quote:Uhm, canāt we just talkā¦first, I meanā¦for a minuteā¦ā You say in a small voice and suddenly you are aware how you must sound like a chick. You know, those chicks who say, āCanāt we just cuddle today and talk?ā If Obiero did it, Who Am I?
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Rank: Elder Joined: 5/21/2013 Posts: 2,841 Location: Here
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Swenani wrote:We don't, we ejaculate frequently either by landing or jerking! Quote:Scared because you have never had a finger up your anus before, leave alone another manās finger. Of course there was always that odd freaky ex who suddenly put a finger in there during the migwatos and you had jumped up bewildered, āWhat the hell is that all about, Flora!! Quote:ou suddenly notice, with alarm, how thick his fingers are. I mean, if Floraās finger freaked you out like that, this finger will certainly get you pregnant! You study his nails. They are kind of long. What if they poke through the gloves and severe an artery in your rectum and you bleed to death in that room? Will he be fingered for malpractice? You wonder Quote:Then with even more apprehension you ask yourself, OK, what if I end up liking it? There are tales of men going for prostate examination and getting aroused. What does that mean? Wait, do you even want to know what that means? And what if that experience stays in your mind long after you have gone home? In traffic? As you buy juice? As you shower? What if you wonāt be able to think about anything but how it felt? Does that suddenly change your sexuality? Will you be able to look at another finger and wonder Quote:Uhm, canāt we just talkā¦first, I meanā¦for a minuteā¦ā You say in a small voice and suddenly you are aware how you must sound like a chick. You know, those chicks who say, āCanāt we just cuddle today and talk?ā Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/26/2012 Posts: 15,980
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Rankaz13 wrote:Swenani wrote:We don't, we ejaculate frequently either by landing or jerking! Quote:Scared because you have never had a finger up your anus before, leave alone another manās finger. Of course there was always that odd freaky ex who suddenly put a finger in there during the migwatos and you had jumped up bewildered, āWhat the hell is that all about, Flora!! Quote:ou suddenly notice, with alarm, how thick his fingers are. I mean, if Floraās finger freaked you out like that, this finger will certainly get you pregnant! You study his nails. They are kind of long. What if they poke through the gloves and severe an artery in your rectum and you bleed to death in that room? Will he be fingered for malpractice? You wonder Quote:Then with even more apprehension you ask yourself, OK, what if I end up liking it? There are tales of men going for prostate examination and getting aroused. What does that mean? Wait, do you even want to know what that means? And what if that experience stays in your mind long after you have gone home? In traffic? As you buy juice? As you shower? What if you wonāt be able to think about anything but how it felt? Does that suddenly change your sexuality? Will you be able to look at another finger and wonder Quote:Uhm, canāt we just talkā¦first, I meanā¦for a minuteā¦ā You say in a small voice and suddenly you are aware how you must sound like a chick. You know, those chicks who say, āCanāt we just cuddle today and talk?ā "There are only two emotions in the market, hope & fear. The problem is you hope when you should fear & fear when you should hope: - Jesse Livermore
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/8/2013 Posts: 2,517
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Lets-bury-a-kikuyu these people wapi @njunge "šš”KQ makes money for everyone except the shareholder šš " overheard in Wazua
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Rank: Elder Joined: 8/4/2008 Posts: 2,849 Location: Rupi
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Rank: User Joined: 8/15/2013 Posts: 13,236 Location: Vacuum
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going by this description,I have seen Njunge once at kinoo Quote:It would also be easy to identify Kikuyus, apart from, of course, their gaudy shirts. If you saw frantic grown-ass men at Kencom stage rushing home to cook before their women got home, they would be a Kuyu. If Obiero did it, Who Am I?
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Rank: User Joined: 8/15/2013 Posts: 13,236 Location: Vacuum
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Quote:Then I noticed that they donāt open the casket. The body is only viewed at the morgue and once they shut it, thatās it folks. They will only view the body in shags by special request from those who didnāt view it at the morgue. They might as well be burying Bugs Bunny in that coffin for all they care. Us, we open the damned thing up, because we have to confirm if you are being buried in decent shoes. If Obiero did it, Who Am I?
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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Rank: Elder Joined: 10/4/2006 Posts: 13,821 Location: Nairobi
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Swenani wrote:Quote:Then I noticed that they donāt open the casket. The body is only viewed at the morgue and once they shut it, thatās it folks. They will only view the body in shags by special request from those who didnāt view it at the morgue. They might as well be burying Bugs Bunny in that coffin for all they care. Us, we open the damned thing up, because we have to confirm if you are being buried in decent shoes. i decided to read it tonight - I laughed out at a dinner table in a restaurant somewhere south of the sahara. I didn't care! by the way ... WHAT'S WITH THE HATS? SIKUWAHI PEWA HIYO MEMO BUT I SEE MOST OF MY RELAZ AND THEIR RELAZ DONNING SOME. BROWN HATS... it had a few self reflection sombre points - we really move on quick. could it explain the fact that most kyuks are either fervent christians or drunkards? we may need a shrink. by the way - that "crying on the inside" stuff is real! no one except small babies and people who had not been there for the matangaz shed tears (I have shed my own share of tears but away from the public eye). I loved the article. by the way - the photos question? what I have obsevered is that the closest kin of the deceased keep them -hutapata yako! they have videos as well. when people visit you are given a whole bunch of albums and there is a discussion as you wait for food to cook. funeral photos are also taken coz they are like the surest way of getting to know who your 3rd cousin on your mother's side is. you get to meet many people with your names or variations of your names. photos of these people are kept. All Mushrooms are edible! Some Mushroom are only edible ONCE!
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Rank: Elder Joined: 5/21/2013 Posts: 2,841 Location: Here
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Rank: Elder Joined: 5/21/2013 Posts: 2,841 Location: Here
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A witty review of the Nissan GTR by one Baraza.Quote:You had best be awake when you mash the firewall. The transformation from āautomatic Datsun coupéā to āPorsche-Slaying Maniacā is instantaneous. The downshifts become harder.
The upshifts become brutal. The acceleration is relentless. The braking is merciless. Cornering in this car actually hurts, it DOES hurt; more so if you had a heavy lunch involving numerous tacos and several cans of chilled soft drink in the baking California heat like yours truly.
While the car goes like it was launched by a giant rubber band and stops like it has hit a tree, it is through the turns that its ability beggars belief. Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 10/18/2008 Posts: 3,434 Location: Kerugoya
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Man About Town over at the Business Daily.Those articles are so real. I cannot help but to wonder if he speaks from experience.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 6/23/2014 Posts: 1,652
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masukuma wrote:Swenani wrote:Quote:Then I noticed that they donāt open the casket. The body is only viewed at the morgue and once they shut it, thatās it folks. They will only view the body in shags by special request from those who didnāt view it at the morgue. They might as well be burying Bugs Bunny in that coffin for all they care. Us, we open the damned thing up, because we have to confirm if you are being buried in decent shoes. i decided to read it tonight - I laughed out at a dinner table in a restaurant somewhere south of the sahara. I didn't care! by the way ... WHAT'S WITH THE HATS? SIKUWAHI PEWA HIYO MEMO BUT I SEE MOST OF MY RELAZ AND THEIR RELAZ DONNING SOME. BROWN HATS... it had a few self reflection sombre points - we really move on quick. could it explain the fact that most kyuks are either fervent christians or drunkards? we may need a shrink. by the way - that "crying on the inside" stuff is real! no one except small babies and people who had not been there for the matangaz shed tears (I have shed my own share of tears but away from the public eye). I loved the article. by the way - the photos question? what I have obsevered is that the closest kin of the deceased keep them -hutapata yako! they have videos as well. when people visit you are given a whole bunch of albums and there is a discussion as you wait for food to cook. funeral photos are also taken coz they are like the surest way of getting to know who your 3rd cousin on your mother's side is. you get to meet many people with your names or variations of your names. photos of these people are kept. Hutia Mundu!!
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Rank: Elder Joined: 7/10/2008 Posts: 9,131 Location: Kanjo
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Rank: User Joined: 8/15/2013 Posts: 13,236 Location: Vacuum
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Rank: Elder Joined: 12/9/2009 Posts: 1,491 Location: Nairobi
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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Rank: User Joined: 8/15/2013 Posts: 13,236 Location: Vacuum
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Try hit a girl todayQuote:The skinny cop looks at the damage and says itās not bad, that we can sort it out, so could we remove these cars from the road immediately? We drive and park by Chaka Road and, still with hands across her chest, she rolls her eyes all the way to the back of her skull when I tell her I will offer her 1,500 bob. (I know, hehe). After 30mins or serious pulling and tagging we finally agree on 3K. I pay her and she gets into her car and drives off without even giving me a hug. (Nkt). If Obiero did it, Who Am I?
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/7/2007 Posts: 11,935 Location: Nairobi
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 lovely piece. Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
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