Let's start with your premises:

1) It's not true that the guy puts in all the effort. Ladies put in lots of effort to attract, send cues, encourage and finally corner their 'Prey'.

2) The issue of climaxing is fifty-fifty. There are cases where no one cares of how fast it comes. On the other hand, considering fake orgasms and high levels of inhibition, most cases will register the man coming too soon anyway, irrespective of time spent

3)All social interaction is a performance

Now to the question about who wins: Considering historical data across cultures, and from personal experience, there's no outright winner. Only a sort of modus vivendi and continuation of the wheel of suffering.

There's only one wheel of suffering. The one that drives you to repeat the same thing while expecting for a different result. I'll let you tell us the furthest an orgasm has taken you save to the next.

As for the next one, the performance is the same old porn stuff that will happen. The guy who killed the doctor with an axe, the lady trying to shake off the stalker while eating his money... etc. Same script different cast.

Exercise in futility? It makes me want to puke!