Bosco: I think I have a problem with my eyes Boss

Boss: Sorry for that. Whats up?

Bosco: I cant SEE myself coming to work tomorrow.

why you should never date an economist...

1. Economists may be dangerous. Watch out for the invisible hands!

2. It won’t matter what you supply, they will always demand more.

3. They consider selfish behavior the most natural thing in the world.

4. They prefer doing it with models and dummies.

5. Economists habitually deflate everything.

6. They like their love lives like they like their markets: free and open.

7. On average they are pretty mean.

8. And definitely too trendy.

9. They will never be happy with you as you are, they will always want you to grow.

10. They require a lot of stimulus in order to expand.

11. They will spend their lives trying to predict your behavior.

12. They consider you perfectly substitutable.

13. They’ll only like you if you have plenty of elasticity.

14. They will always think that there is an acceptable level of unemployment.

15. As soon as you are happy in the relationship they’ll burst your bubble.

16. They’ll only be into you if you have plenty of boom and bust.

17. They’ll never say “I Love you” only that “You optimise my utility”.

18. They will rate your kids’ advancement into a Human Development Index.

19. They will establish very clear household property rights to avoid the tragedy of the commons.

20. If you ever get depressed, they’ll lower their interest rate to zero.

21. They might collect a stratified household survey of family and friends, run regression and cluster analyses and check for heteroskedasticity before deciding to commit to you. (On the plus side you might get to see what your love looks like as a formula).


Source: Stolen via Jodi Beggs - Economists Do It With Models....21 reasons not to date an Economist

Ctrl V, ctrl P.

Steve The Assistant....

A Bemba doctor wanted to go hunting; he calls his assistant Steve and tells him...
Ya Steve , I am going hunting tomorrow, we don't want to close the Clinic, I ask you to take care of our patients.

Yes, sir......answers Steve.

The doctor goes hunting and returns the next day and asks:

So Steve, how was your day?

PA tells him he took care of 3 patients.

The first one had a headache and I gave him TYLENOL.

Bravo Steve, and the second one?

The second one had stomach burning and I gave him MAALOX,sir.

Bravo ya Steve you're good at this, and the third one?

Sir, I was seated, suddenly the door opens and a woman enters like a ''flame'' and undresses herself, taking off her bra, 'NICE
BIG ONES SIR' and then takes off her panties 'YA ALLAHHHH'.....then
she jumps and sleeps on the table and shouts 'HELP ME. Since 5 years I have not seen any man!!!!!!'

And what did you do Steve?

I put eye drops in her eyes sir!!!!