Get married and land cheaply whenever wherever. Consider the costs of mpango wa viazi: amarulla, sambuca, java, taxi, nywele, choma, fry and you are not assured.

1.Turn off the TV and all the lights to save electricity and tell the kids it's a game of hide-and-seek.
2.Time your visits to 7 friends, each on one day of the week,around dinner time to get free meals the whole week.

nicesst thread,.....

Always use half tomato and half onion when cooking.
Drink tea without sugar, tell friends you forgot to stir the tea (sugar is at the base) if they question
take cham on fridays and sleep the whole weekend
let your girlfriend come in your house, no going to unnecessary places
avoid shopping at the local kiosks, they are expensive
harvest rain water whenever it rains, its free.
Develop a sudden alergy for frothy drinks on weekends

The secrete is to strike a bargain and bargain for everything….. Including flight tickets!!!.

Operator: Thank you for calling Kenya Airways. How may I help you?
Kenyan: Hallo. Germany ni pesa ngapi?

Operator: That will be Ksh 55,000 one-way.
Kenyan: Lakini si hiyo ni bei ya kuongea?

Operator: Am afraid the price is fixed.
Kenyan: Na nikishukia France nitembee hapo pengine?

Operator: Sir, the price for the flight is fixed.
Kenyan: Hata nikasimama?

Operator: That is not allowed on the flight sir.
Kenyan: Haya basi, nitakaa kwa shimo yenye iko katikati ya viti. Hiyo ni pesa ngapi?

Operator: Sir, I said the price for the flight is fixed.
Kenyan: Ai? Wacha nipigie Juma.

Operator: Who is Juma sir.
Kenyan: He is my relative. You see my grandfather had three wives. So Juma is the son to the brother of my sister's cousin from the second wife of the brother of my grandfather. Anafanya kazi huko kwenu. Am sure ataongea na wewe mnibebe sare.

Operator: Am afraid that will not be possible sir.
Kenyan: Haiya. Na wewe ni mgumu? Na mzigo je?

Operator: We allow 25 kgs carry-on luggage per passenger sir.
Kenyan: I have about kilo mia moja.

Operator: We will charge you Ksh 500 per extra kilo.
Kenyan: Si nitajishikia? Ni gunia moja tu. Nitashikia hapo nyuma ya pilot.

Operator: Am afraid only hand luggage is allowed sir.
Kenyan: Jesus! Nyinyi watu mnatunyanyasa. Ninaomba serikali iangalie hii mambo. Ok. Wacha nitalipa hiyo pesa.

Operator: Thank you.
Kenyan: Oh! Just one more thing. Naenda na Jane, mtoto wa sister yangu. Huyo si naweza kumshika tu?

Operator: How old is she sir?
Kenyan: Ni mtoto. She is only sixteen.

Operator: Am afraid that will be an additional ticket sir.
Kenyan: What do you mean another ticket? Mtoto. Lakini si ni half price kwa sababu ni mtoto eh?

Operator: No sir. She will pay the same rate as an adult sir.
Kenyan: Ai? Ksh 110,000. Hiyo ni mingi sana. Kwani ni plot nanunua? Ai? Hapana. Wacha twende na Meli.

@ Investor, U 4 real ? I 'defected' to omena since I cant afford the big fish, I dont care about my neighbors complaints!