Atalaku wrote:C&P)
Dear Safaricom,
It has been a while since we talked....hope you are doing okay. I know you know I am well. I would like to take this opportunity to thank you for the free 30 shillings you give me everytime I make a phone call, it goes a long way to ensure that bae and I are not stopped by that annoying sound when one is out of airtime. I, however, have one question for you, what happened to me being able to buy internet bundles? Why do you want me to subscribe for the service? Who asked you for free sms? Do you want me to text you back? The reason I'm actually still awake is so that I just use the night bundles thing you give me. Where do you take the expired bundles by the way? Is it used to help purchase the pick ups and houses you generously give us? Because I would totally support you! Dear Safaricom, I want us to play a game called 'imagine.' Imagine buying your favourite whiskey and being told that if you don't drink the same within 24 hours, it would disappear or worse, turn to water....how would you feel? I can only equate your actions to that of having a chips funga whereby, you have to do all you need to do before the break of dawn when she needs to leave so you literally don't sleep. Ain't our relationship deeper than that? Imagine if hotels dictated how long we had to eat the food they served us before they took it away or ATMs dictated how fast you should spend the cash dispensed (this I can hack though). Wouldn't life be sad and hard and depressing and annoying? Yes? That is how I'm currently feeling after you decided to shove the subscription thing down our throats.
Dear safaricom, unlike the rest, I'm not going to threaten that I will move to other networks....noooo! I have put so much time, emotions and work in this relationship to quit but I would like you to imagine and hopefully allow me to purchase internet bundles just like I used to.
Ps. I would like a list of all the single men who won the beautiful houses.....I own a cleaning service company and I'm sure they will find me handy.
Sincerely,
Dear Magigi,
Kindly note that safaricom is not for poor people;This company is for people who live in Runda just like you(wazua).If you feel our services are out of reach or unfair to you, we advise you to move to orange or airtell where they offer free internet bundles.
We are in fact disappointed that our customer doesn't have a fibre optic connection in his house;Please desist from associating your name with our great company or visit any of our sales department and we will get your house and business connected on our fibre optic network.
If you look at our financials for 2013,you will note that we made our money from ripping our customers on data and mpesa services, our revenues from voice and sms have been decreasing at an increasing rate thus why we are offering free sms and voice calls since they aren't profitable.
We hope that you will keep on enjoying our ripping services as we plan to move to hourly data bundles which expire within the hour.
Regards,
Pope Cally more
If Obiero did it, Who Am I?