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Peculiar Diasporan habits
masukuma
#61 Posted : Friday, December 05, 2014 10:45:16 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 10/4/2006
Posts: 13,821
Location: Nairobi
there is this old article on the standard that keeps cracking me up! ANTICS OF DIASPORA RETURNEES



Quote:
Often, all their estimates of distance are not based, say, on the mileage from Nairobi to Mombasa, but on the distance from New Jersey to Washington. And all their monetary calculations are based on the dollar or the euro. "How much do I pay in American dollars?" they may ask puzzled pump attendants and taxi drivers.
All Mushrooms are edible! Some Mushroom are only edible ONCE!
butterflyke
#62 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 12:25:12 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 5/1/2010
Posts: 3,024
Location: Hapa
ecstacy wrote:
murchr wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
murchr wrote:
Fikira wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
As for the ladies who return, what's with lecturing EVERYONE in customer service whilst on tweng mode??


But the customer service there SUCKS .. we just don't know why/how you put up with it!



Indeed customer service in Kenya sucks. It's rather peculiar that kenyans expect no one to say something about it esp when one is used to being pampered just for being a customer.

Customer service usually sucks in +254, but who says you have to assume EVERYONE in customer service sucks??

Example, once at Art Caffe and the summer bunnies call for service..waiter comes and they are not ready to order..so "we" chat for a cool 5mins on a busy evening as people are deciding what to order. Waiter indicates she will be back shortly when we ready to order..which she did another 5 mins later..the sanctimonious loud lecture she was given for "leaving the table unserviced" was appalling!!! classless.


I guess whoever you are talking about is not EVERYONE either. Funny thing is the best customer service you'd receive in Kenya will be found in the hospitality industry, the rest banks et Al are extremely poor.


True.

On this side of things, I think resident locals and their support systems need to socialize the future generations to learn to act and demand better, respectfully. Standards (even beyond the customer service industry) are low across the board.

On consumerism, I think maybe it's because we are still at a very basic bread and butter situation but with a growing middle class, demand for service quality will increase as disposable income increases. The continuous arrival of global brands could attest to this.


Customer service in Kenya is wanting, you do not need to be a peculiar 'diasporan' to notice...we deserve and should demand better
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. - Muhammad Ali🐝
Impunity
#63 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 1:49:47 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 3/2/2009
Posts: 26,325
Location: Masada
kiash wrote:
The funniest thing is that Kenyans in Kenya will laugh and criticize the diaporans on their peculiar habits. Is it a disaporan who complained the other day about ERC and fuel prices? You pay for 100Ksh for a litre of whatever then complain ati ERC are not doing their jobbo,how long do you need to work to afford a full tank ? ask a disaporan how long he needs to work to fill a full tank. The same ones who created traffic jam the other day on Mbs roas coz they had run out of fuel. Then walk and hitch hike with vibuyus.


How much do get paid for washing one tired and old *ss?
Portfolio: Sold
You know you've made it when you get a parking space for your yatcht.

ecstacy
#64 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 4:55:55 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/26/2008
Posts: 4,449
butterflyke wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
murchr wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
murchr wrote:
Fikira wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
As for the ladies who return, what's with lecturing EVERYONE in customer service whilst on tweng mode??


But the customer service there SUCKS .. we just don't know why/how you put up with it!



Indeed customer service in Kenya sucks. It's rather peculiar that kenyans expect no one to say something about it esp when one is used to being pampered just for being a customer.

Customer service usually sucks in +254, but who says you have to assume EVERYONE in customer service sucks??

Example, once at Art Caffe and the summer bunnies call for service..waiter comes and they are not ready to order..so "we" chat for a cool 5mins on a busy evening as people are deciding what to order. Waiter indicates she will be back shortly when we ready to order..which she did another 5 mins later..the sanctimonious loud lecture she was given for "leaving the table unserviced" was appalling!!! classless.


I guess whoever you are talking about is not EVERYONE either. Funny thing is the best customer service you'd receive in Kenya will be found in the hospitality industry, the rest banks et Al are extremely poor.


True.

On this side of things, I think resident locals and their support systems need to socialize the future generations to learn to act and demand better, respectfully. Standards (even beyond the customer service industry) are low across the board.

On consumerism, I think maybe it's because we are still at a very basic bread and butter situation but with a growing middle class, demand for service quality will increase as disposable income increases. The continuous arrival of global brands could attest to this.


Customer service in Kenya is wanting, you do not need to be a peculiar 'diasporan' to notice...we deserve and should demand better

Read..and understand.
MaichBlack
#65 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 8:08:07 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/22/2009
Posts: 7,451
T10 wrote:
Stupid people and the way mnapenda kuomba omba. I would rather wipe jungu's behind than live maisha ya pesa nane hiyo Kenya yenu.

He he he. These diasporans are extremely deluded. Life is better here than huko majuu. We are making money here. And given the comparative cost of living, what we make affords us a decent life. Most diasporans on the other hand literally live hand to mouth. Every time they receive their mail they panic! Yet another bill! Maxed out credit cards etc. Madeni kibao na ni ya recurrent expenditure!

A typical diasporan cannot go out Friday and Saturday. The time alone is not available. You have to work 16 hours a day to pay your bills and credit card debts. The less than 10% that have professional jobs have it good. And funny enough, they are the grounded ones. The burger flipping elderly women washing type ndio wanakuaga na pang'ang'a mingi. Na ubaya ndio wengi.

Just because you send your cousin Kshs. 2,000/= every 3 months, don't think the rest of us are here waiting on your handouts. We are hustling and investing. We probably need to bail you out.
Never count on making a good sale. Have the purchase price be so attractive that even a mediocre sale gives good returns.
MaichBlack
#66 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 8:24:31 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/22/2009
Posts: 7,451
@T10 - And you cannot compare yourself with everyone in Kenya. You probably couldn't get a job in Kenya before you left - even casual. So you are probably better of off there. We probably still couldn't have anything for you if you came back. We rarely abandon our elderly in 'homes' and burger flipping and dish washing jobs are all taken.
Never count on making a good sale. Have the purchase price be so attractive that even a mediocre sale gives good returns.
butterflyke
#67 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 9:19:31 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 5/1/2010
Posts: 3,024
Location: Hapa
ecstacy wrote:
butterflyke wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
murchr wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
murchr wrote:
Fikira wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
As for the ladies who return, what's with lecturing EVERYONE in customer service whilst on tweng mode??


But the customer service there SUCKS .. we just don't know why/how you put up with it!



Indeed customer service in Kenya sucks. It's rather peculiar that kenyans expect no one to say something about it esp when one is used to being pampered just for being a customer.

Customer service usually sucks in +254, but who says you have to assume EVERYONE in customer service sucks??

Example, once at Art Caffe and the summer bunnies call for service..waiter comes and they are not ready to order..so "we" chat for a cool 5mins on a busy evening as people are deciding what to order. Waiter indicates she will be back shortly when we ready to order..which she did another 5 mins later..the sanctimonious loud lecture she was given for "leaving the table unserviced" was appalling!!! classless.


I guess whoever you are talking about is not EVERYONE either. Funny thing is the best customer service you'd receive in Kenya will be found in the hospitality industry, the rest banks et Al are extremely poor.


True.

On this side of things, I think resident locals and their support systems need to socialize the future generations to learn to act and demand better, respectfully. Standards (even beyond the customer service industry) are low across the board.

On consumerism, I think maybe it's because we are still at a very basic bread and butter situation but with a growing middle class, demand for service quality will increase as disposable income increases. The continuous arrival of global brands could attest to this.


Customer service in Kenya is wanting, you do not need to be a peculiar 'diasporan' to notice...we deserve and should demand better

Read..and understand.


Kuwa mpole, wewe hujanielewa. I am actually agreeing with you smile
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. - Muhammad Ali🐝
Bigchick
#68 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 9:28:39 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/8/2013
Posts: 4,068
Location: At Large.
So this mchongowano is about what?

Tusichafuane roho!Tis as season to be Jolly

The dynamics of life are such that some people will move out of Kenya.Some will do well others will struggle.Its only human to think when in the first world you are doing better than those you left behind in +254.

In the similar fashion where city guys imagine they are doing better than rural guys.

Lets all strive to be happy wherever we are and make your neighbour happy too.

Love is beautiful and so are those who share it.With Love, Marriage is an amazing event in ones life time, the foundation of joy, happiness and success.
MaichBlack
#69 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 9:39:19 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/22/2009
Posts: 7,451
Two more things @T9 + 1

1) It is your relatives who like borrowing and that is something you can discuss in your family get together as you give them stories of how 'back home' you guys have an app for slaughtering goats. Has any Wazuan or random Kenyan asked you for Money?

2) Most Kenyans (just like other Africans) send money to their relatives - it is African to share what you have with those who don't have. It's only that some of the benefactors are in the diaspora. The amount of money diasporans send back home can't even come close to what Kenyans within send to their relatives. You can ask Safaricom for sample data. And what's more the Kenyans within don't go shouting about it. If you have decided to pay school for someone, do it and shut the hell up!
Never count on making a good sale. Have the purchase price be so attractive that even a mediocre sale gives good returns.
ecstacy
#70 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 9:59:37 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/26/2008
Posts: 4,449
butterflyke wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
butterflyke wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
murchr wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
murchr wrote:
Fikira wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
As for the ladies who return, what's with lecturing EVERYONE in customer service whilst on tweng mode??


But the customer service there SUCKS .. we just don't know why/how you put up with it!



Indeed customer service in Kenya sucks. It's rather peculiar that kenyans expect no one to say something about it esp when one is used to being pampered just for being a customer.

Customer service usually sucks in +254, but who says you have to assume EVERYONE in customer service sucks??

Example, once at Art Caffe and the summer bunnies call for service..waiter comes and they are not ready to order..so "we" chat for a cool 5mins on a busy evening as people are deciding what to order. Waiter indicates she will be back shortly when we ready to order..which she did another 5 mins later..the sanctimonious loud lecture she was given for "leaving the table unserviced" was appalling!!! classless.


I guess whoever you are talking about is not EVERYONE either. Funny thing is the best customer service you'd receive in Kenya will be found in the hospitality industry, the rest banks et Al are extremely poor.


True.

On this side of things, I think resident locals and their support systems need to socialize the future generations to learn to act and demand better, respectfully. Standards (even beyond the customer service industry) are low across the board.

On consumerism, I think maybe it's because we are still at a very basic bread and butter situation but with a growing middle class, demand for service quality will increase as disposable income increases. The continuous arrival of global brands could attest to this.


Customer service in Kenya is wanting, you do not need to be a peculiar 'diasporan' to notice...we deserve and should demand better

Read..and understand.


Kuwa mpole, wewe hujanielewa. I am actually agreeing with you smile

smile
MatataMingi
#71 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 11:51:06 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 11/17/2009
Posts: 395
Location: Where everyone knows you
MaichBlack wrote:
T10 wrote:
Stupid people and the way mnapenda kuomba omba. I would rather wipe jungu's behind than live maisha ya pesa nane hiyo Kenya yenu.

He he he. These diasporans are extremely deluded. Life is better here than huko majuu. We are making money here. And given the comparative cost of living, what we make affords us a decent life. Most diasporans on the other hand literally live hand to mouth. Every time they receive their mail they panic! Yet another bill! Maxed out credit cards etc. Madeni kibao na ni ya recurrent expenditure!

A typical diasporan cannot go out Friday and Saturday. The time alone is not available. You have to work 16 hours a day to pay your bills and credit card debts. The less than 10% that have professional jobs have it good. And funny enough, they are the grounded ones. The burger flipping elderly women washing type ndio wanakuaga na pang'ang'a mingi. Na ubaya ndio wengi.

Just because you send your cousin Kshs. 2,000/= every 3 months, don't think the rest of us are here waiting on your handouts. We are hustling and investing. We probably need to bail you out.


This is very true.These guys don't go out of their way to acquire foreign accents etc. When they visit or return, you hardly notice that they have been away.
MatataMingi
#72 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 5:41:22 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 11/17/2009
Posts: 395
Location: Where everyone knows you
Do we have any accurate figures of Kenyan professionals in the Diaspora. Less than 10% seems too low.I know a lot of bankers, doctors, finance guys out there.
geofreygachie
#73 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 9:37:09 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 2/27/2014
Posts: 454
Location: Republic of Enchantment.
Fikira wrote:
streetwise wrote:
And when the guy says he is in transport business...taxi driver


He could also be driving a tractor trailer - that's what many people are into these days. I am yet to come across a Kenyan taxi driver (not saying they don't exist thought).

A family friend was there some years and seemed to earn good money from the tractor trailer biz.He had to get certified by the driving schools there for the job.Later he messed up a thing or 2 and he is back home.Always in shades dont know why ???????
Divers - can you laugh in scuba gear, or will you drown? I was wondering. - James May.
MaichBlack
#74 Posted : Saturday, December 06, 2014 10:40:53 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/22/2009
Posts: 7,451
MatataMingi wrote:
Do we have any accurate figures of Kenyan professionals in the Diaspora. Less than 10% seems too low.I know a lot of bankers, doctors, finance guys out there.

The US and Europe (especially Western and Northern Europe)? Not that many (proportionally). Of course numbers are even lower in South America and Asia. Southern Africa - Botswana, Namibia, South Africa etc. - there is quite a good number.
Never count on making a good sale. Have the purchase price be so attractive that even a mediocre sale gives good returns.
Wendz
#75 Posted : Tuesday, December 09, 2014 12:21:04 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/19/2008
Posts: 4,268
MaichBlack wrote:
MatataMingi wrote:
Do we have any accurate figures of Kenyan professionals in the Diaspora. Less than 10% seems too low.I know a lot of bankers, doctors, finance guys out there.

The US and Europe (especially Western and Northern Europe)? Not that many (proportionally). Of course numbers are even lower in South America and Asia. Southern Africa - Botswana, Namibia, South Africa etc. - there is quite a good number.


The only accent I have noted that people come with from SA is "there".... they say "the-e" WTH!
quicksand
#76 Posted : Tuesday, December 09, 2014 3:10:02 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 7/5/2010
Posts: 2,061
Location: Nairobi
MaichBlack wrote:
T10 wrote:
Stupid people and the way mnapenda kuomba omba. I would rather wipe jungu's behind than live maisha ya pesa nane hiyo Kenya yenu.

He he he. These diasporans are extremely deluded. Life is better here than huko majuu. We are making money here. And given the comparative cost of living, what we make affords us a decent life. Most diasporans on the other hand literally live hand to mouth. Every time they receive their mail they panic! Yet another bill! Maxed out credit cards etc. Madeni kibao na ni ya recurrent expenditure!

A typical diasporan cannot go out Friday and Saturday. The time alone is not available. You have to work 16 hours a day to pay your bills and credit card debts. The less than 10% that have professional jobs have it good. And funny enough, they are the grounded ones. The burger flipping elderly women washing type ndio wanakuaga na pang'ang'a mingi. Na ubaya ndio wengi.

Just because you send your cousin Kshs. 2,000/= every 3 months, don't think the rest of us are here waiting on your handouts. We are hustling and investing. We probably need to bail you out.

Very true. Have you noticed the increasing number of Kenyans frequently flying to Europe and the Americas for holidays and shopping trips? And these are not obscenely rich people with mansions in Runda, hapana, its middle level managers, smart young entrepreneurs and hotshot professionals working for an increasing number of multinationals. Very soon watu huko majuu will be going "when is so and so from Nairobi flying back in for holidays? he/she showed us such a good time last visit".
KulaRaha
#77 Posted : Tuesday, December 09, 2014 3:34:17 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/26/2007
Posts: 6,514
Another odd diasporan habit is supporting american basketball teams without knowing any of the players or stats. Every guy is wearing Chicago Bolls or LA Lockers caps, and t shirts etc.

And most of them are barely 5'4" tall.

LOOOOOOL.
Business opportunities are like buses,there's always another one coming
Ric dees
#78 Posted : Thursday, December 18, 2014 10:20:00 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 3/6/2008
Posts: 632

Lol Sh*t is funny as hell..

@ Kularaha Mugsey Bogues was 5:5 or something probably thats the fascination..

Enyewe this diaspora guys all over town are a sight to behold..probably that's what my pals are saying behind my back lol..

The greatest danger in times of turbulence is not the turbulence; it is to act with yesterday's logic.
Boris Boyka
#79 Posted : Sunday, December 21, 2014 9:24:43 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/15/2013
Posts: 1,977
Location: Here
Quote:
2. Plastic patriotism
By the time of leaving Kenya, our friends in the Diaspora
would have had it ‘up to here’ with ‘this backward country.’
However, upon landing huko majuu and realising that they are
now being referred to as ‘backward,’ they are filled with a new
sense of patriotism.They suddenly say wanajivunia kuwa Wakenya. The Kenyanflag, which they previously didn’t have time for, now becomesa must-have accessory. They stay awake to make that Skype call to local Kenyan TV stations, they used to watch cable TV
while in the country, to give ideas on how best Uwezo Fund
can be put to use.
7. Ransom remittances
Records show that remittances from the diaspora have been
rising over the years with the figure standing at $12.9 million
in 2013. But unknown to many is the fact that some of these
remittances are done under duress from family members who
believe those in the Diaspora swim in money. To avoid the
shame of letting their folks know their pathetic state, they just
have to keep sending money at whatever cost.
8. Hosanna Hallelujah!
When most of our countrymen and countrywomen leave
Kenya, they were the local Kimenyis; They knew every joint
that was happening in their home area and could out-drink
everyone in the local pub. However, a few months out there,
they start posting religious and inspirational messages on
social media, proclaiming to all and sundry, their new-found
faith. What could have happened on the road to Damascus,
sorry, US?!

www.standardmedia.co.ke/...out-kenyans-in-diaspora.
Everybody STEALS, a THIEF is one who's CAUGHT stealing something of LITTLE VALUE. !!!
wanyee
#80 Posted : Sunday, December 21, 2014 1:25:58 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 7/17/2011
Posts: 627
Location: Mbui-Nzau, Kikumbulyu
geofreygachie wrote:
Fikira wrote:
streetwise wrote:
And when the guy says he is in transport business...taxi driver


He could also be driving a tractor trailer - that's what many people are into these days. I am yet to come across a Kenyan taxi driver (not saying they don't exist thought).

A family friend was there some years and seemed to earn good money from the tractor trailer biz.He had to get certified by the driving schools there for the job.Later he messed up a thing or 2 and he is back home.Always in shades dont know why ???????
Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
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