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Range Rover Sports wanted for hire
jaggernaut
#1 Posted : Tuesday, February 25, 2014 11:55:21 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 10/9/2008
Posts: 5,389
My former primary school has invited me for a harambee next weekend and I want to hire a RR sports (strictly a black KBX or KBY) so that i can make a grand entry at the function.
I have hired my taxi guy to be my driver for the day, and the bouncer at my local to act as my bodyguard. My Toyota will act as a chase car.
The arrangement is that when we arrive at the function, my bodyguard will enthusiastically open the car door for me, salute me, and also carry my briefcase containing the donation, while the driver will park the car, spend the whole time wiping the dust off the car etc, and pick me at the dias after the function. I will ask my 'bodyguard' to make several calls to my phone when am at the dias and I will be handing the phone to him 'to take' my calls.
At the function I will make a monetary donation, and also give some desktop computers (ex UK refurbished) to the school and promise to pay fees for any pupil from the school who will be admitted to a national school after sitting the 2014 kcpe exam.
I have also paid some 3 respected wazees from the area (who are scheduled to speak at the function), to beg me to consider representing the constituency in Parliament in the next elections since "I have proven to be development conscious, unlike the current MP who disappeared to Nairobi after he was elected".
So how much will the RR cost me to hire for a day?
harrydre
#2 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 2:09:22 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/10/2008
Posts: 9,131
Location: Kanjo
jaggernaut wrote:
My former primary school has invited me for a harambee next weekend and I want to hire a RR sports (strictly a black KBX or KBY) so that i can make a grand entry at the function.
I have hired my taxi guy to be my driver for the day, and the bouncer at my local to act as my bodyguard. My Toyota will act as a chase car.
The arrangement is that when we arrive at the function, my bodyguard will enthusiastically open the car door for me, salute me, and also carry my briefcase containing the donation, while the driver will park the car, spend the whole time wiping the dust off the car etc, and pick me at the dias after the function. I will ask my 'bodyguard' to make several calls to my phone when am at the dias and I will be handing the phone to him 'to take' my calls.
At the function I will make a monetary donation, and also give some desktop computers (ex UK refurbished) to the school and promise to pay fees for any pupil from the school who will be admitted to a national school after sitting the 2014 kcpe exam.
I have also paid some 3 respected wazees from the area (who are scheduled to speak at the function), to beg me to consider representing the constituency in Parliament in the next elections since "I have proven to be development conscious, unlike the current MP who disappeared to Nairobi after he was elected".
So how much will the RR cost me to hire for a day?


Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Applause Applause Applause Applause

@Mawinder' is doing a good job teaching folks how to fake it till you make it! He should easily get you one. smile
i.am.back!!!!
Kusadikika
#3 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 2:53:37 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/22/2008
Posts: 2,703
jaggernaut wrote:
My former primary school has invited me for a harambee next weekend and I want to hire a RR sports (strictly a black KBX or KBY) so that i can make a grand entry at the function.
I have hired my taxi guy to be my driver for the day, and the bouncer at my local to act as my bodyguard. My Toyota will act as a chase car.
The arrangement is that when we arrive at the function, my bodyguard will enthusiastically open the car door for me, salute me, and also carry my briefcase containing the donation, while the driver will park the car, spend the whole time wiping the dust off the car etc, and pick me at the dias after the function. I will ask my 'bodyguard' to make several calls to my phone when am at the dias and I will be handing the phone to him 'to take' my calls.
At the function I will make a monetary donation, and also give some desktop computers (ex UK refurbished) to the school and promise to pay fees for any pupil from the school who will be admitted to a national school after sitting the 2014 kcpe exam.
I have also paid some 3 respected wazees from the area (who are scheduled to speak at the function), to beg me to consider representing the constituency in Parliament in the next elections since "I have proven to be development conscious, unlike the current MP who disappeared to Nairobi after he was elected".
So how much will the RR cost me to hire for a day?


Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Go for it man!! We only live once. You will not be hurting anyone and you will have loads of fun. While at it do not forget to leave some young boys inspired by letting them stare into the interiors of the car and let them know that it too is within their reach if they work hard.

It may however be a bit too early to start on these expensive poses because you have to maintain them for the 3 years before the next elections. They might burn you out and people have time to dig out your true identity and pecuniary status. The strategy is good but I advise to go with caution and not do anything too flashy until you have only a year left to the elections.
captain kirk
#4 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 3:08:57 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 7/28/2013
Posts: 178
@Jag, go for it. Nairobi car hire services 45,000 daily 6:30 a.m to 6:00 pm in Nbi. I suggest @ Swenani hook you up with a hot looking decently dressed fish to complete the picture.Remember what Kabogo said about marriage and leadership and single people.
murchr
#5 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 3:46:17 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/26/2012
Posts: 15,980
Make sure it has a sun roof so that when you are bidding them farewell you make that signature wave asking them waishi na amani.
"There are only two emotions in the market, hope & fear. The problem is you hope when you should fear & fear when you should hope: - Jesse Livermore
.
Gathige
#6 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 6:44:19 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 3/29/2011
Posts: 2,242
@jaggernaut, Remember to introduce the "real" first ready too during the day. Arrange also with the school to have the school choir prepare a song in your honour and do a dance with them.
"Things that matter most must never be at the mercy of things that matter least." Goethe
McReggae
#7 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 7:42:20 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/17/2008
Posts: 23,365
Location: Nairobi
jaggernaut wrote:
My former primary school has invited me for a harambee next weekend and I want to hire a RR sports (strictly a black KBX or KBY) so that i can make a grand entry at the function.
I have hired my taxi guy to be my driver for the day, and the bouncer at my local to act as my bodyguard. My Toyota will act as a chase car.
The arrangement is that when we arrive at the function, my bodyguard will enthusiastically open the car door for me, salute me, and also carry my briefcase containing the donation, while the driver will park the car, spend the whole time wiping the dust off the car etc, and pick me at the dias after the function. I will ask my 'bodyguard' to make several calls to my phone when am at the dias and I will be handing the phone to him 'to take' my calls.
At the function I will make a monetary donation, and also give some desktop computers (ex UK refurbished) to the school and promise to pay fees for any pupil from the school who will be admitted to a national school after sitting the 2014 kcpe exam.
I have also paid some 3 respected wazees from the area (who are scheduled to speak at the function), to beg me to consider representing the constituency in Parliament in the next elections since "I have proven to be development conscious, unlike the current MP who disappeared to Nairobi after he was elected".
So how much will the RR cost me to hire for a day?


Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Goood one, how much will your donation be?
..."Wewe ni mtu mdogo sana....na mwenye amekuandika pia ni mtu mdogo sana!".
MKWASI
#8 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 7:43:16 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 4/20/2012
Posts: 888
jaggernaut wrote:
My former primary school has invited me for a harambee next weekend and I want to hire a RR sports (strictly a black KBX or KBY) so that i can make a grand entry at the function.
I have hired my taxi guy to be my driver for the day, and the bouncer at my local to act as my bodyguard. My Toyota will act as a chase car.
The arrangement is that when we arrive at the function, my bodyguard will enthusiastically open the car door for me, salute me, and also carry my briefcase containing the donation, while the driver will park the car, spend the whole time wiping the dust off the car etc, and pick me at the dias after the function. I will ask my 'bodyguard' to make several calls to my phone when am at the dias and I will be handing the phone to him 'to take' my calls.
At the function I will make a monetary donation, and also give some desktop computers (ex UK refurbished) to the school and promise to pay fees for any pupil from the school who will be admitted to a national school after sitting the 2014 kcpe exam.
I have also paid some 3 respected wazees from the area (who are scheduled to speak at the function), to beg me to consider representing the constituency in Parliament in the next elections since "I have proven to be development conscious, unlike the current MP who disappeared to Nairobi after he was elected".
So how much will the RR cost me to hire for a day?


Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
Good Idea..while considering RR sports consider also a chopper, The whole village and neighbouring locations will feel your presence. It will also send shocking signals to area MP.
Robinhood
#9 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 7:45:49 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 12/11/2008
Posts: 2,306
@Jagger, do you also have a flywhisk? The local butcher could easily get you a Mkia from the day's slaughtered cow. Comes in handy with flies and whatnot!!
Great men are not always wise, neither do the aged understand judgement...
majimaji
#10 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 8:45:49 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 4/4/2007
Posts: 1,162
captain kirk wrote:
@Jag, go for it. Nairobi car hire services 45,000 daily 6:30 a.m to 6:00 pm in Nbi. I suggest @ Swenani hook you up with a hot looking decently dressed fish to complete the picture.Remember what Kabogo said about marriage and leadership and single people.


I have several fishes you can choose from, 5k per day. no extras.smile
Angelica _ann
#11 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 8:49:19 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 12/7/2012
Posts: 11,908
You also need to pay some village mamas to sing and dance for you and buy out youth hecklers to shutup on the day!

You need the fish to wear mama's some kitenge and clutch bag, smile alot and not get irritated with hugs and perks of village mamas.
In the business world, everyone is paid in two coins - cash and experience. Take the experience first; the cash will come later - H Geneen
mawinder
#12 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 9:18:24 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 4/30/2008
Posts: 6,029
harrydre wrote:
jaggernaut wrote:
My former primary school has invited me for a harambee next weekend and I want to hire a RR sports (strictly a black KBX or KBY) so that i can make a grand entry at the function.
I have hired my taxi guy to be my driver for the day, and the bouncer at my local to act as my bodyguard. My Toyota will act as a chase car.
The arrangement is that when we arrive at the function, my bodyguard will enthusiastically open the car door for me, salute me, and also carry my briefcase containing the donation, while the driver will park the car, spend the whole time wiping the dust off the car etc, and pick me at the dias after the function. I will ask my 'bodyguard' to make several calls to my phone when am at the dias and I will be handing the phone to him 'to take' my calls.
At the function I will make a monetary donation, and also give some desktop computers (ex UK refurbished) to the school and promise to pay fees for any pupil from the school who will be admitted to a national school after sitting the 2014 kcpe exam.
I have also paid some 3 respected wazees from the area (who are scheduled to speak at the function), to beg me to consider representing the constituency in Parliament in the next elections since "I have proven to be development conscious, unlike the current MP who disappeared to Nairobi after he was elected".
So how much will the RR cost me to hire for a day?


Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Applause Applause Applause Applause

@Mawinder' is doing a good job teaching folks how to fake it till you make it! He should easily get you one. smile

So long as it is not in my constituency otherwisw you will see fire.Get in touch with Patrick on 0721492423,he will even organise the shase car,security detail in suits complete with radiocalls.
accelriskconsult
#13 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 9:31:07 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 4/2/2011
Posts: 629
Location: Nai
jaggernaut wrote:
My former primary school has invited me for a harambee next weekend and I want to hire a RR sports (strictly a black KBX or KBY) so that i can make a grand entry at the function.
I have hired my taxi guy to be my driver for the day, and the bouncer at my local to act as my bodyguard. My Toyota will act as a chase car.
The arrangement is that when we arrive at the function, my bodyguard will enthusiastically open the car door for me, salute me, and also carry my briefcase containing the donation, while the driver will park the car, spend the whole time wiping the dust off the car etc, and pick me at the dias after the function. I will ask my 'bodyguard' to make several calls to my phone when am at the dias and I will be handing the phone to him 'to take' my calls.
At the function I will make a monetary donation, and also give some desktop computers (ex UK refurbished) to the school and promise to pay fees for any pupil from the school who will be admitted to a national school after sitting the 2014 kcpe exam.
I have also paid some 3 respected wazees from the area (who are scheduled to speak at the function), to beg me to consider representing the constituency in Parliament in the next elections since "I have proven to be development conscious, unlike the current MP who disappeared to Nairobi after he was elected".
So how much will the RR cost me to hire for a day?



Admin should give us a 'like' button.
What role will Impunity play?
IDP
#14 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 9:37:18 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 8/26/2009
Posts: 76
Pay several guys 1k to kneel down as they shake your hand at the dias
Wa_ithaka
#15 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 9:43:54 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 1/7/2010
Posts: 1,279
Location: nbi
Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
Please also hire some bodas bodas to ride infront and behind as you enter
The Governor of Nyeri - 2017
Swenani
#16 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 9:45:53 AM
Rank: User


Joined: 8/15/2013
Posts: 13,237
Location: Vacuum
captain kirk wrote:
@Jag, go for it. Nairobi car hire services 45,000 daily 6:30 a.m to 6:00 pm in Nbi. I suggest @ Swenani hook you up with a hot looking decently dressed fish to complete the picture.Remember what Kabogo said about marriage and leadership and single people.


No he doesn't need more expenses for a hot looking fish, he will easily attract the female teachers for free fish eating overnight.You can always invite me as a back up incase they are too many willing female teachers on offer
If Obiero did it, Who Am I?
MKWASI
#17 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 10:50:46 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 4/20/2012
Posts: 888
mawinder wrote:
harrydre wrote:
jaggernaut wrote:
My former primary school has invited me for a harambee next weekend and I want to hire a RR sports (strictly a black KBX or KBY) so that i can make a grand entry at the function.
I have hired my taxi guy to be my driver for the day, and the bouncer at my local to act as my bodyguard. My Toyota will act as a chase car.
The arrangement is that when we arrive at the function, my bodyguard will enthusiastically open the car door for me, salute me, and also carry my briefcase containing the donation, while the driver will park the car, spend the whole time wiping the dust off the car etc, and pick me at the dias after the function. I will ask my 'bodyguard' to make several calls to my phone when am at the dias and I will be handing the phone to him 'to take' my calls.
At the function I will make a monetary donation, and also give some desktop computers (ex UK refurbished) to the school and promise to pay fees for any pupil from the school who will be admitted to a national school after sitting the 2014 kcpe exam.
I have also paid some 3 respected wazees from the area (who are scheduled to speak at the function), to beg me to consider representing the constituency in Parliament in the next elections since "I have proven to be development conscious, unlike the current MP who disappeared to Nairobi after he was elected".
So how much will the RR cost me to hire for a day?


Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Applause Applause Applause Applause

@Mawinder' is doing a good job teaching folks how to fake it till you make it! He should easily get you one. smile

So long as it is not in my constituency otherwisw you will see fire.Get in touch with Patrick on 0721492423,he will even organise the shase car,security detail in suits complete with radiocalls.


This one, from one and only @mawinder will surely leave no doubt.
ZZE123
#18 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 11:07:24 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/21/2008
Posts: 2,490
McReggae wrote:
jaggernaut wrote:
My former primary school has invited me for a harambee next weekend and I want to hire a RR sports (strictly a black KBX or KBY) so that i can make a grand entry at the function.
I have hired my taxi guy to be my driver for the day, and the bouncer at my local to act as my bodyguard. My Toyota will act as a chase car.
The arrangement is that when we arrive at the function, my bodyguard will enthusiastically open the car door for me, salute me, and also carry my briefcase containing the donation, while the driver will park the car, spend the whole time wiping the dust off the car etc, and pick me at the dias after the function. I will ask my 'bodyguard' to make several calls to my phone when am at the dias and I will be handing the phone to him 'to take' my calls.
At the function I will make a monetary donation, and also give some desktop computers (ex UK refurbished) to the school and promise to pay fees for any pupil from the school who will be admitted to a national school after sitting the 2014 kcpe exam.
I have also paid some 3 respected wazees from the area (who are scheduled to speak at the function), to beg me to consider representing the constituency in Parliament in the next elections since "I have proven to be development conscious, unlike the current MP who disappeared to Nairobi after he was elected".
So how much will the RR cost me to hire for a day?


Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Goood one, how much will your donation be?

@Jagger - So how much??
The man who marries a beautiful woman, and the farmer who grows corn by the roadside have the same problem
Swenani
#19 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 11:13:16 AM
Rank: User


Joined: 8/15/2013
Posts: 13,237
Location: Vacuum
ZZE123 wrote:
McReggae wrote:
jaggernaut wrote:
My former primary school has invited me for a harambee next weekend and I want to hire a RR sports (strictly a black KBX or KBY) so that i can make a grand entry at the function.
I have hired my taxi guy to be my driver for the day, and the bouncer at my local to act as my bodyguard. My Toyota will act as a chase car.
The arrangement is that when we arrive at the function, my bodyguard will enthusiastically open the car door for me, salute me, and also carry my briefcase containing the donation, while the driver will park the car, spend the whole time wiping the dust off the car etc, and pick me at the dias after the function. I will ask my 'bodyguard' to make several calls to my phone when am at the dias and I will be handing the phone to him 'to take' my calls.
At the function I will make a monetary donation, and also give some desktop computers (ex UK refurbished) to the school and promise to pay fees for any pupil from the school who will be admitted to a national school after sitting the 2014 kcpe exam.
I have also paid some 3 respected wazees from the area (who are scheduled to speak at the function), to beg me to consider representing the constituency in Parliament in the next elections since "I have proven to be development conscious, unlike the current MP who disappeared to Nairobi after he was elected".
So how much will the RR cost me to hire for a day?


Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Goood one, how much will your donation be?

@Jagger - So how much??


Write a post dated cheque of Kshs.2million, then go to your bank to report loss of your cheque book
If Obiero did it, Who Am I?
Jump-steady
#20 Posted : Wednesday, February 26, 2014 11:22:26 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 12/1/2008
Posts: 1,098
ZZE123 wrote:
McReggae wrote:
jaggernaut wrote:
My former primary school has invited me for a harambee next weekend and I want to hire a RR sports (strictly a black KBX or KBY) so that i can make a grand entry at the function.
I have hired my taxi guy to be my driver for the day, and the bouncer at my local to act as my bodyguard. My Toyota will act as a chase car.
The arrangement is that when we arrive at the function, my bodyguard will enthusiastically open the car door for me, salute me, and also carry my briefcase containing the donation, while the driver will park the car, spend the whole time wiping the dust off the car etc, and pick me at the dias after the function. I will ask my 'bodyguard' to make several calls to my phone when am at the dias and I will be handing the phone to him 'to take' my calls.
At the function I will make a monetary donation, and also give some desktop computers (ex UK refurbished) to the school and promise to pay fees for any pupil from the school who will be admitted to a national school after sitting the 2014 kcpe exam.
I have also paid some 3 respected wazees from the area (who are scheduled to speak at the function), to beg me to consider representing the constituency in Parliament in the next elections since "I have proven to be development conscious, unlike the current MP who disappeared to Nairobi after he was elected".
So how much will the RR cost me to hire for a day?


Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Goood one, how much will your donation be?

@Jagger - So how much??


The donation will be carried inside a briefcase, A couple of million shillingsDrool Drool
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