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Bribes don't help the police.
Rank: Elder Joined: 5/21/2013 Posts: 2,841 Location: Here
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Magigi wrote:mkenyan wrote:Njung'e wrote:Close to 28 years on EA roads and not a penny to a traffic cop. you give them notes, I see. @njunge...damn..no cop would dare stand on the way of bijuti...I am sure they for stop you and by the time bijuti decides to stop it is already 1 km away.... Ara!! Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/7/2007 Posts: 11,935 Location: Nairobi
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Magigi wrote:mkenyan wrote:Njung'e wrote:Close to 28 years on EA roads and not a penny to a traffic cop. you give them notes, I see. @njunge...damn..no cop would dare stand on the way of bijuti...I am sure they for stop you and by the time bijuti decides to stop it is already 1 km away....  .If i get an accident in this one,i am certain i will die from a 100% tetanus.Not my own injuries. Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 12/17/2010 Posts: 1,163 Location: Sudan
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Police make alot of money on the road...and yes they put it to good use. Flats, land, matatus. A lady friend in traffic runs 3 minibuses that ply one of the city routes. Just like KRA and Immigration and treasury and God knows which govt office is not corrupt. Sh*t "Peace is our profession, War is our business" ...Unknown
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Rank: Elder Joined: 10/28/2008 Posts: 2,276 Location: Kibish
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@kiterunner and digitek what's funny?? Nadondosha meli kubwa seuze ngalawa!
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/22/2009 Posts: 2,449 Location: Africa
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Um Sayala wrote:Police make alot of money on the road...and yes they put it to good use. Flats, land, matatus. A lady friend in traffic runs 3 minibuses that ply one of the city routes.
Just like KRA and Immigration and treasury and God knows which govt office is not corrupt. Sh*t And Roads engineers: filthy rich
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Rank: Member Joined: 2/20/2009 Posts: 658
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 A typical traffic policeman in Kenya. The guy did not swallow a python!!!
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/31/2008 Posts: 7,081 Location: Kenya
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segemia wrote: A typical traffic policeman in Kenya. The guy did not swallow a python!!! ...and the dick seems to be competing with the tummy...when did the guy last see it?
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Rank: Elder Joined: 5/1/2010 Posts: 3,024 Location: Hapa
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Njung'e wrote:Magigi wrote:mkenyan wrote:Njung'e wrote:Close to 28 years on EA roads and not a penny to a traffic cop. you give them notes, I see. @njunge...damn..no cop would dare stand on the way of bijuti...I am sure they for stop you and by the time bijuti decides to stop it is already 1 km away....  .If i get an accident in this one,i am certain i will die from a 100% tetanus.Not my own injuries. Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. - Muhammad Ali🐝
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Rank: Elder Joined: 1/17/2013 Posts: 4,693 Location: Earth
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segemia wrote: A typical traffic policeman in Kenya. The guy did not swallow a python!!! That gun can go off out of pressure. yuck.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/31/2008 Posts: 7,081 Location: Kenya
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kysse wrote:segemia wrote: A typical traffic policeman in Kenya. The guy did not swallow a python!!! That gun can go off out of pressure. yuck. Which gun...metaphorical or literal gun?
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/18/2011 Posts: 12,069 Location: Kianjokoma
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Njung'e wrote:mkenyan wrote:Njung'e wrote:Close to 28 years on EA roads and not a penny to a traffic cop. you give them notes, I see.  ....Lecture notes yes!  cant be nailed! Wewe umeishi miaka mingi. Hiyo ni kama miaka ya wengine wetu hapa
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Rank: Member Joined: 4/24/2012 Posts: 331 Location: Vantage point
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digitek1,kiterunner wrote: Sawa you've made your point but kujeni pole pole
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 3/27/2009 Posts: 1,437
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Njung'e wrote:Close to 28 years on EA roads and not a penny to a traffic cop. Assuming you got your license in your early twendis, you are likely to be below 50. Guka wa doti.komu.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 11/1/2008 Posts: 834
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Rankaz13 wrote:The traffic enforcement system is rigged against the motorist right from the word go. From experience, these guys more or less know all the matatus in their routes. Whenever they see a new one, they'll arrest your driver on trumped up charges (like a worn out spare tyre) just so that the owner can present themselves eti 'wajue ni nani'. The more brazen ones will keep harassing your driver, especially if you insist on not 'tipping', in an attempt to force him to quit. When this happened severally to me, one of them had the audacity to tell me to my face 'eti wewe futa hiyo dereva yako tukupatie dereva mzuri upee yeye kazi'. The shock must've been evident in my silence. Of course I never acceded to this. Nilisema ka mbaya ni mbaya, played some dirty tricks of my own, earned my respect. please share.... If you are going to be thinking only one thing, you might as well be thinking big. -Donald J . Trump
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 5/11/2010 Posts: 918
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Until they clean up the system, I will bribe without batting an eyelid. See, sometime ago I rear-ended a government vehicle at the Waiyaki Way - James Gichuru juntion. After speaking to the driver and his transport manager, we agreed that if I fixed the scratched bumper, we could put the matter to rest. After assessing the damage on both cars, I reasoned that it would be a good idea to obtain a police abstract and get my insurer to make the repairs. So we decided to drive to the nearby Muthangari police station to report the incident. We told the policeman that we had agreed to settle the matter between ourselves and all I wanted was an abstract about the case. The officer recorded the details on the incident and promised to report it to the Nairobi Area police station - which is where accidents involving GOK vehicles are handled. He assured me it would be a small matter and they would soon call me for the abstract. Both the GOK driver and myself left the police station. I received a call from Nairobi Area at around 9:00am. The accident had happened at about 6:30am. They said that in order to issue me with an abstract, I should take my car for inspection since that was the standard procedure for accidents involving GOK vehicles. Faithfully, I voluntarily drove to the police station. To cut a long story short, both the GOK driver and I were harassed, threatened with prosecution and my vehicle impounded for the night. By the next morning, I reasoned it was not worth it trying to follow the straight and narrow. I bribed a senior officer and dejectedly drove out of the police station. I never got the abstract. Of course I went on to fix both cars with my own money. But from that day I swore never to waste time with traffic cops trying to follow the law. I don't bend it that often, the law, but on the few occasions when it happens, I am not going to watch a miserable, barely-literate, underpaid cop with bribe targets to meet take me in circles for a whole day because of a few hundred shillings. No. Learn first to treat your time as you would your money, then treat your money as you do your time.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 10/25/2007 Posts: 1,574
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seppuku wrote:Until they clean up the system, I will bribe without batting an eyelid. See, sometime ago I rear-ended a government vehicle at the Waiyaki Way - James Gichuru juntion. After speaking to the driver and his transport manager, we agreed that if I fixed the scratched bumper, we could put the matter to rest. After assessing the damage on both cars, I reasoned that it would be a good idea to obtain a police abstract and get my insurer to make the repairs.
So we decided to drive to the nearby Muthangari police station to report the incident. We told the policeman that we had agreed to settle the matter between ourselves and all I wanted was an abstract about the case. The officer recorded the details on the incident and promised to report it to the Nairobi Area police station - which is where accidents involving GOK vehicles are handled. He assured me it would be a small matter and they would soon call me for the abstract. Both the GOK driver and myself left the police station.
I received a call from Nairobi Area at around 9:00am. The accident had happened at about 6:30am. They said that in order to issue me with an abstract, I should take my car for inspection since that was the standard procedure for accidents involving GOK vehicles. Faithfully, I voluntarily drove to the police station.
To cut a long story short, both the GOK driver and I were harassed, threatened with prosecution and my vehicle impounded for the night. By the next morning, I reasoned it was not worth it trying to follow the straight and narrow. I bribed a senior officer and dejectedly drove out of the police station. I never got the abstract.
Of course I went on to fix both cars with my own money. But from that day I swore never to waste time with traffic cops trying to follow the law. I don't bend it that often, the law, but on the few occasions when it happens, I am not going to watch a miserable, barely-literate, underpaid cop with bribe targets to meet take me in circles for a whole day because of a few hundred shillings. No. Ok. Alright. Still driving on the right side of the highway, I see. Set out to correct the world's wrongs and you will most certainly wind up adding to them.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 4/27/2010 Posts: 951 Location: Nyumbani
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Magigi wrote:Is there a motorist in the house who has never given the police a bribe? Let me see by show of hands. We have seen it on our tv's police receiving bribes...and they do it every day. Now my question is, why do the police look so poor, so miserable. They are either thin , too fat they look famished and slovenly, they smell like @kiash's goats! Both literary and figuratively...It was declared that in their dress code men should not wear different two different socks...like go to work with one foot in blue and the other other one in red...I couldn't believe I was reading this...even the local village madman who has s tendency of wearing socks only never confuses the pair's of socks people offer him. He puts on the same colour of socks, the same design...oh my...God save our country... Funny that i singled this out i thought it was concluded when the topic ended that its wakenyas who stink ? not by me of course. So ungesema they stink like kina sisi magigi.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/2/2007 Posts: 8,776 Location: Cameroon
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seppuku wrote:Until they clean up the system, I will bribe without batting an eyelid. See, sometime ago I rear-ended a government vehicle at the Waiyaki Way - James Gichuru juntion. After speaking to the driver and his transport manager, we agreed that if I fixed the scratched bumper, we could put the matter to rest. After assessing the damage on both cars, I reasoned that it would be a good idea to obtain a police abstract and get my insurer to make the repairs.
So we decided to drive to the nearby Muthangari police station to report the incident. We told the policeman that we had agreed to settle the matter between ourselves and all I wanted was an abstract about the case. The officer recorded the details on the incident and promised to report it to the Nairobi Area police station - which is where accidents involving GOK vehicles are handled. He assured me it would be a small matter and they would soon call me for the abstract. Both the GOK driver and myself left the police station.
I received a call from Nairobi Area at around 9:00am. The accident had happened at about 6:30am. They said that in order to issue me with an abstract, I should take my car for inspection since that was the standard procedure for accidents involving GOK vehicles. Faithfully, I voluntarily drove to the police station.
To cut a long story short, both the GOK driver and I were harassed, threatened with prosecution and my vehicle impounded for the night. By the next morning, I reasoned it was not worth it trying to follow the straight and narrow. I bribed a senior officer and dejectedly drove out of the police station. I never got the abstract.
Of course I went on to fix both cars with my own money. But from that day I swore never to waste time with traffic cops trying to follow the law. I don't bend it that often, the law, but on the few occasions when it happens, I am not going to watch a miserable, barely-literate, underpaid cop with bribe targets to meet take me in circles for a whole day because of a few hundred shillings. No. Hiyo tu! Trying to follow the law with a kenyan cop is like telling goats to take a shower. Waste of effort. Paris yeye hiyo finje n curse it! TULIA.........UFUNZWE!
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/31/2008 Posts: 7,081 Location: Kenya
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simonkabz wrote:seppuku wrote:Until they clean up the system, I will bribe without batting an eyelid. See, sometime ago I rear-ended a government vehicle at the Waiyaki Way - James Gichuru juntion. After speaking to the driver and his transport manager, we agreed that if I fixed the scratched bumper, we could put the matter to rest. After assessing the damage on both cars, I reasoned that it would be a good idea to obtain a police abstract and get my insurer to make the repairs.
So we decided to drive to the nearby Muthangari police station to report the incident. We told the policeman that we had agreed to settle the matter between ourselves and all I wanted was an abstract about the case. The officer recorded the details on the incident and promised to report it to the Nairobi Area police station - which is where accidents involving GOK vehicles are handled. He assured me it would be a small matter and they would soon call me for the abstract. Both the GOK driver and myself left the police station.
I received a call from Nairobi Area at around 9:00am. The accident had happened at about 6:30am. They said that in order to issue me with an abstract, I should take my car for inspection since that was the standard procedure for accidents involving GOK vehicles. Faithfully, I voluntarily drove to the police station.
To cut a long story short, both the GOK driver and I were harassed, threatened with prosecution and my vehicle impounded for the night. By the next morning, I reasoned it was not worth it trying to follow the straight and narrow. I bribed a senior officer and dejectedly drove out of the police station. I never got the abstract.
Of course I went on to fix both cars with my own money. But from that day I swore never to waste time with traffic cops trying to follow the law. I don't bend it that often, the law, but on the few occasions when it happens, I am not going to watch a miserable, barely-literate, underpaid cop with bribe targets to meet take me in circles for a whole day because of a few hundred shillings. No. Hiyo tu! Trying to follow the law with a kenyan cop is like telling goats to take a shower. Waste of effort. Paris yeye hiyo finje n curse it! ...ama kuosha nguruwe!
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Rank: Elder Joined: 10/9/2008 Posts: 5,389
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majimaji wrote: The traffic and justice system is designed to intimidate. You cannot escape bribing the police.
True. Sometimes it makes sense to give a bribe to avoid alot of hustle and i have done it a few times. Scenario 1. I was driving from Nbi to Eldoret for some business on a saturday. Then at Nakuru town I was arrested for speeding i.e. doing 62kph in a 50kph zone. The cops asked me to pay a bond of 3k and that I was to appear at the Nakuru lawcourts the follwoing monday to answer to overspeeding charges. It didn't make sense for me to follow the law to the letter and suffer such inconvenience and therefore after some talk i gave some small bribe and continued with my business. Scenario 2. I was stopped by a cop hapo waiyaki way and was asked to give him my driving license. He then noticed that I had not signed the license after renewal. He said it was an offense and we should go to the station. Of course 100bob did the trick after which I promptly signed the license and proceeded with my business. Scenario 3. Not having a life saver. That was before we were reminded that they are mandatory. Scenario 4. One of my side mirrors was ripped off by thieves only for me to be arrested a few hours later for driving without one. Of course I had to give the cop something small. Scenario 5. Allegedly driving with a 'worn out tyre'. Some time back my car had some problem with alignment of one of the front wheels and so it became slightly worn out on the outer side. I was arrested for this and after a long argument regarding the definition of a worn out tyre, I decided to part with something small since the cop wad adamant that we drive to station and I pay a bond to appear in court the next day.
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