Wazua
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Just for laughs...corner
Rank: Member Joined: 10/4/2007 Posts: 656
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Rank: Chief Joined: 8/24/2009 Posts: 5,909 Location: Nairobi
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C&P
...If you have slept with over 8 guys you have absolutely no right to call your reproductive organ "A PRIVATE PART" it now belongs to the GOVERNMENT under the Ministry of Tourism, Department of Explicit Entertainment and Pleasure. And if it happens to be more than 10 guys, it now belongs to the UNITED NATIONS Humanitarian Council under Donor Aid. And if it’s more than 15 it should be prosecuted at the ICC for crimes Against Distortion of Private parts...
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/19/2008 Posts: 4,268
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C& P
What we've reduced our animals to......
Ati Kenya animals chatting…
DOG: sasa pussy CAT: poa sana doggy DOG: habari ya madayz CAT: waah ata usitaje, huskii niliingia ndani ya mtungi juzi? DOG: LOl! sasa wewe niwapi huko ulingia? Guess mimi niliingia wapi ...? CAT: pwahahaaa ...wee nawe ni mnoma aki, unawezaje chukua galfrend wa wenyewe. DOG: Sikupenda aki pussy, wao ndo walijipa. CAT: hahahaa iyo kweli ni kama ndrama, ni kama vindio (miaooo) ..c uniunganishie mmoja tusaidiane. DOG: wee sema tu hivyo na niko wanted na sirikali NGURUWE: heh, sisi ata tushaingia parliament wazito, raha nayo, ata kuna face painting ..
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Rank: Member Joined: 2/12/2010 Posts: 474 Location: Nairobi
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washiku wrote:Teacher: What does the Green colour in the National Flag represent?? Otieno: ( Shouting) Gor Mahia! Kamau: ( Shouting) MPESA! Mogaka: (Shouting ) Mandizi! Kiplagat: (Shouting) Majani Chai! Murungi: (Shouting) Miraa! Mohamed : Cactus Davie: Afya Center. (have never stepped out of Nai) Baraza: (Shouting) MULIRO GARDENS! Musyoka: (In a low voice) Aki ya Ngai iyo Siyui Is it only me who don't see the 'joke' in such tribal posts? Keep it simple
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/2/2011 Posts: 4,818 Location: -1.2107, 36.8831
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(o)(o) Perfect breasts ( + )( + ) Fake breasts (*)(*) Perky breasts (@)(@) Big Nipple breasts oo A-cups { O }{ O } D-cups (oYo) Wonder bra breasts ( ^ )( ^ ) Cold breasts (o)(O) Lopsided breasts (Q)(Q) Pierced Breasts (p)(p) Hanging Tassels breasts \o/\o/ Grandma's Breasts ( - )( - ) Against The shower Door Breasts | o | | o | Android Breasts ($) ($) Prostitute's Breasts (~o~)(~o~) Stretch mark breasts Receive with simplicity everything that happens to you.” ― Rashi
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Rank: Elder Joined: 4/22/2010 Posts: 11,522 Location: Nairobi
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richdad wrote:washiku wrote:Teacher: What does the Green colour in the National Flag represent?? Otieno: ( Shouting) Gor Mahia! Kamau: ( Shouting) MPESA! Mogaka: (Shouting ) Mandizi! Kiplagat: (Shouting) Majani Chai! Murungi: (Shouting) Miraa! Mohamed : Cactus Davie: Afya Center. (have never stepped out of Nai) Baraza: (Shouting) MULIRO GARDENS! Musyoka: (In a low voice) Aki ya Ngai iyo Siyui Is it only me who don't see the 'joke' in such tribal posts? Its only you who doesnt see...our diversity shouldnt make as turn away from who we are,I never chose to be born in whatever tribe I am in...that then should make me proud for indeed its the Almighty God who saw it fit for me to be either Luhya,Kisii,Luo,Kikuyu,Kalenjin,Taita,Borana etc the joke isnt deragatory in anyway.... possunt quia posse videntur
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Rank: Elder Joined: 12/7/2012 Posts: 11,908
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maka wrote:richdad wrote:washiku wrote:Teacher: What does the Green colour in the National Flag represent?? Otieno: ( Shouting) Gor Mahia! Kamau: ( Shouting) MPESA! Mogaka: (Shouting ) Mandizi! Kiplagat: (Shouting) Majani Chai! Murungi: (Shouting) Miraa! Mohamed : Cactus Davie: Afya Center. (have never stepped out of Nai) Baraza: (Shouting) MULIRO GARDENS! Musyoka: (In a low voice) Aki ya Ngai iyo Siyui Is it only me who don't see the 'joke' in such tribal posts? Its only you who doesnt see...our diversity shouldnt make as turn away from who we are,I never chose to be born in whatever tribe I am in...that then should make me proud for indeed its the Almighty God who saw it fit for me to be either Luhya,Kisii,Luo,Kikuyu,Kalenjin,Taita,Borana etc the joke isnt deragatory in anyway.... well put @maka. we should also appreciate that there are tribal jokes and jokes which promote tribalism. i think this falls under the former - acceptable. In the business world, everyone is paid in two coins - cash and experience. Take the experience first; the cash will come later - H Geneen
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/2/2011 Posts: 4,818 Location: -1.2107, 36.8831
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#Stolen SAFARICOM MPESA EASTLANDS VERSION DM75EC927 imeconfirmiwa. Umerecieve Ngiri ashu soo basa (Ksh10,700.00) from Impunity McReggea +254720****** on 4/6/2013 githaa ya 03:30 maafteh. M PESA balance yako pyamu ni ngiri finje soo basa na tujongo tutatu (Ksh.50,703.00) Kuna hii vako ya kusave na kuget kiloan kwa ile form ya Mshwari. Wagwan joh kwa ku-use Saf the Mambo byad Option. Receive with simplicity everything that happens to you.” ― Rashi
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 11/26/2008 Posts: 745
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Rank: Elder Joined: 10/4/2006 Posts: 13,821 Location: Nairobi
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/15/2011 Posts: 4,518
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dunkang wrote:#Stolen
SAFARICOM MPESA EASTLANDS VERSION
DM75EC927 imeconfirmiwa. Umerecieve Ngiri ashu soo basa (Ksh10,700.00) from Impunity McReggea +254720****** on 4/6/2013 githaa ya 03:30 maafteh. M PESA balance yako pyamu ni ngiri finje soo basa na tujongo tutatu (Ksh.50,703.00) Kuna hii vako ya kusave na kuget kiloan kwa ile form ya Mshwari. Wagwan joh kwa ku-use Saf the Mambo byad Option. crazy. "The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
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Rank: Member Joined: 8/2/2010 Posts: 480 Location: chokoo
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C & P
A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children.. .
"You all have obsessions ,"he observed. To the first mother, Mary, he said,"You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy.
"He turned to the second Mom, Ann:"Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny.
"He turns to the third Mom, Joyce:"Your obsession is alcohol. This too manifests itself in your child's name, Brandy."
At this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispers."Come on, Joystick, we' re leaving!"
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Rank: Elder Joined: 5/25/2012 Posts: 4,105 Location: 08c
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karqui wrote:C & P
A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children.. .
"You all have obsessions ,"he observed. To the first mother, Mary, he said,"You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy.
"He turned to the second Mom, Ann:"Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny.
"He turns to the third Mom, Joyce:"Your obsession is alcohol. This too manifests itself in your child's name, Brandy."
At this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispers."Come on, Joystick, we' re leaving!" At this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispers."Come on, Dick, we' re leaving!" Pesa Nane plans to be shilingi when he grows up.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 2/25/2009 Posts: 973
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/19/2013 Posts: 2,552
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/19/2013 Posts: 2,552
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Borrow money from a pessimist.They don't expect it back. I never forget a face but in your case I'll make an exception.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 10/14/2009 Posts: 2,057
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c & p "Unamanga dame wa M-Pesa anakuuliza ka Imeingia."" If you are an eagle don't hang around with chickens; chickens don't fly....
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/19/2013 Posts: 2,552
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The linguistics professor decided to spice up his lecture by comparing languages to mathematics. As he scribbled examples on the board, he explained how both math and languages had positives and negatives.
"In both math and language, two negatives, when combined, make a positive. However," he droned on, "in math or language two positives never make a negative."
From the back row of the room one student sighed, "Yeah, right."
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Rank: Elder Joined: 5/1/2010 Posts: 3,024 Location: Hapa
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symbols wrote:The linguistics professor decided to spice up his lecture by comparing languages to mathematics. As he scribbled examples on the board, he explained how both math and languages had positives and negatives.
"In both math and language, two negatives, when combined, make a positive. However," he droned on, "in math or language two positives never make a negative."
From the back row of the room one student sighed, "Yeah, right." had to re-read this one a couple of times before i got the joke Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. - Muhammad Ali🐝
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/19/2013 Posts: 2,552
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butterflyke wrote:symbols wrote:The linguistics professor decided to spice up his lecture by comparing languages to mathematics. As he scribbled examples on the board, he explained how both math and languages had positives and negatives.
"In both math and language, two negatives, when combined, make a positive. However," he droned on, "in math or language two positives never make a negative."
From the back row of the room one student sighed, "Yeah, right." had to re-read this one a couple of times before i got the joke Me too.
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