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Involve Your Spouse In financial Decision Making
mawinder
#21 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 9:11:01 PM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 4/30/2008
Posts: 6,029
S.Mutaga III wrote:
tuvok wrote:
+1 on @Young's advice. I am married. I always go out of my way to ensure that our finances are transparent. Note that I said *our*.

Wife and I decided that long ago. It's part of trusting each other.

i may be young (21)but I wont see a wazuan fail where I could have advised...I have elder sisters who I overhear saying "pesa zake ni zetu na zangu ni zangu"...their husbands think financial matters are transparent...just open one bank a/c with another bank and start depositing some cash regularly...and thank me later.

which county do you come from?
Drunkard
#22 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 9:31:35 PM
Rank: User

Joined: 5/3/2011
Posts: 559
Since I cannot comment on political issues, I just have to comment here! First, do not be competely honest with any partner on your finances unless you want to be carrying reciepts for every purchase. If you are talking about how much you pay for rent and electricity, thats fine you can share that with her/him.

Everyone is entitle to their money, marriage do not change that. As long as you find a working arrangements to pay for the shared bills and save for the future, everyone should keep their money separate, the thinking that you can stand infront of a pastor/priest and suddenly someone has unlimited access to your hard earned money is somehow stupid, your mom or dad don't even have such access!
richdad
#23 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 9:32:05 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 2/12/2010
Posts: 474
Location: Nairobi
tuvok wrote:
+1 on @Young's advice. I am married. I always go out of my way to ensure that our finances are transparent. Note that I said *our*.

Wife and I decided that long ago. It's part of trusting each other.



Experience is very expensive but some people insist on trying everything.

Keep it simple
techboy
#24 Posted : Friday, December 14, 2012 9:26:21 PM
Rank: User

Joined: 6/18/2009
Posts: 271
I donot mean to be rude or anything BUT and i mean B-U-T if your spouse reached form four or was a high school dropout what reason does he have to meddle in the families finance ????????
this is where you should think TWICE about marry uneducated spouse . situations of finances cannot be risked because you "fell in love" look beyond love and see if the one you are marrying will bring value and bring some form of support to the family when things are thick .

And after this post i hope the divorce rate of Kenya doesn't sky rocket LOL
faa
#25 Posted : Monday, December 17, 2012 8:20:48 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 5/8/2007
Posts: 709
S.Mutaga III wrote:
tuvok wrote:
+1 on @Young's advice. I am married. I always go out of my way to ensure that our finances are transparent. Note that I said *our*.

Wife and I decided that long ago. It's part of trusting each other.

i may be young (21)but I wont see a wazuan fail where I could have advised...I have elder sisters who I overhear saying "pesa zake ni zetu na zangu ni zangu"...their husbands think financial matters are transparent...just open one bank a/c with another bank and start depositing some cash regularly...and thank me later.



Who told you you are young at 21 years?? You are old.

faa
#26 Posted : Monday, December 17, 2012 8:25:44 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 5/8/2007
Posts: 709
2012 wrote:
jguru wrote:
That's how most men with Kabete wives end up in heaven.


Death is not an option. @jguru next time marry someone you trust that way even God will increase you together.

Going with your theory, what would compel this woman who has vowed to spend the rest of her life with you even in bad times to off you? I can assure you that it's not the new found wealth. After all who will see enjoy it with? Those men are killed because of their mipangos unless you want to tell me all those developments you see in Kiambu are owned by widows.


@ 2012,
You simply dont know.

mukafete - kebete women are known of killing their husbands purely for wealth/money acquisition purposes.

I had over 10 classmates in college from Kiambu who were brought up by single mothers...funnily they have no idea what happened to their fathers....

Kabete women are dangerous
2012
#27 Posted : Monday, December 17, 2012 8:46:12 AM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 12/9/2009
Posts: 6,592
Location: Nairobi
faa wrote:
@ 2012,
You simply dont know.

mukafete - kebete women are known of killing their husbands purely for wealth/money acquisition purposes.

I had over 10 classmates in college from Kiambu who were brought up by single mothers...funnily they have no idea what happened to their fathers....

Kabete women are dangerous



A foolish woman tears her house down with her own hands.

The women or men who kill for the love of money only curse themselves and that money or property will never last. Someone needs to tell them that. I on the other hand know women who have been left by their husbands and are doing very well, much better than the men who ditched them.

As Young said, build your home together and God will bless it. You will never lack and I can testify to that.

BBI will solve it
:)
tom_boy
#28 Posted : Monday, December 17, 2012 10:03:29 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 2/20/2007
Posts: 767
FRM2011 wrote:
Am happy to note the balance of power in most wazua households is still intact in a way that would make our grandfathers proud.


Hiding your finances from your spouse has nothing to do with power and everything to do with fear, corwardice, stupidity, selfishness and pride. If you intend to marry, marry someone you trust. I always ask myself, if she steals from me, what is the worst that will happen?.... nothing... I will continue living and working and making more money. I also flip the coin and ask "what possible reason could she have to steal from me?" Have I made her insecure? Have I acted or said things that would make her think or feel insecure about a future with me? Its a fear dance between the spouses that only leads to destruction!
They must find it difficult....... those who have taken authority as the truth, rather than truth as the authority. -G. Massey.
dunkang
#29 Posted : Monday, December 17, 2012 10:09:39 AM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 6/2/2011
Posts: 4,824
Location: -1.2107, 36.8831
tom_boy wrote:
Hiding your finances from your spouse has nothing to do with power and everything to do with fear, corwardice, stupidity, selfishness and pride. If you intend to marry, marry someone you trust. I always ask myself, if she steals from me, what is the worst that will happen?.... nothing... I will continue living and working and making more money. I also flip the coin and ask "what possible reason could she have to steal from me?" Have I made her insecure? Have I acted or said things that would make her think or feel insecure about a future with me? Its a fear dance between the spouses that only leads to destruction!


we are not talking about stealing from you, its KILLING you.
Receive with simplicity everything that happens to you.” ― Rashi

King G
#30 Posted : Monday, December 17, 2012 5:35:26 PM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 6/20/2012
Posts: 3,855
Location: Othumo
dunkang wrote:
tom_boy wrote:
Hiding your finances from your spouse has nothing to do with power and everything to do with fear, corwardice, stupidity, selfishness and pride. If you intend to marry, marry someone you trust. I always ask myself, if she steals from me, what is the worst that will happen?.... nothing... I will continue living and working and making more money. I also flip the coin and ask "what possible reason could she have to steal from me?" Have I made her insecure? Have I acted or said things that would make her think or feel insecure about a future with me? Its a fear dance between the spouses that only leads to destruction!


we are not talking about stealing from you, its KILLING you.


Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
Thieves
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