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Bosses
blackcobra
#1 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 8:59:57 AM
Rank: New-farer


Joined: 1/7/2010
Posts: 68
Location: kenya
Sometimes i am tempted to give my boss a piece of my mind.... or give her a smack on her face.

This is someone who enjoys belittling me in front of everyone... maybe to show that i am her project.
I approach her when i was in another department and requested that we start a new department .. n since she s influential in the organization, she moved with zeal and within no time the department had been established.
Now it looks like i have to lick her boots the rest of my life.
She keeps reminding me that i will be transferred, or taken back to where i was... yet she cant proof why.
God..... im breaking now!!! Some advises from wazuas?
chemos
#2 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 9:16:16 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 11/28/2006
Posts: 1,799
mtoto akililia wembe mpe..
StatMeister
#3 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 9:20:22 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 5/23/2010
Posts: 868
Location: La Islas Galápagos
blackcobra wrote:
Sometimes i am tempted to give my boss a piece of my mind.... or give her a smack on her face.

This is someone who enjoys belittling me in front of everyone... maybe to show that i am her project.
I approach her when i was in another department and requested that we start a new department .. n since she s influential in the organization, she moved with zeal and within no time the department had been established.
Now it looks like i have to lick her boots the rest of my life.
She keeps reminding me that i will be transferred, or taken back to where i was... yet she cant proof why.
God..... im breaking now!!! Some advises from wazuas?


Smack her **** playfully, or try hard drugs. Its one or other
A bad day fishing is better than a good day at work
segemia
#4 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 9:28:24 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 2/20/2009
Posts: 658
@ blackcobra

When such situations arise as they do too often, try to get her by any means possible..And then jaribu "kupiga yeye kijiti". Things will be very smooth thereafter.
Jus Blazin
#5 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 9:30:11 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 10/23/2008
Posts: 3,966
You could take a bold step and ask her POLITELY what exactly you are doing wrong and what you need to do right. It could be that there's something you aren't doing well, but you are so blinded to what you currently feel about your boss. It could be that, yes, you are her project, but she wants you to harden so that you can succeed when you take over. Succession planning. Or maybe you've been telling everyone it was your idea to set up the department and the rumor has reached her and she wants to remind you who's boss. All these are maybes. But sorry for what you going through.
Luck is when Preparation meets Opportunity. ~ Lucius Annaeus Seneca
Jus Blazin
#6 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 9:33:30 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 10/23/2008
Posts: 3,966
segemia wrote:
@ blackcobra

When such situations arise as they do too often, try to get her by any means possible..And then jaribu "kupiga yeye kijiti". Things will be very smooth thereafter.

Na kama blackcobra ni mamasita?
Luck is when Preparation meets Opportunity. ~ Lucius Annaeus Seneca
Lolest!
#7 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 9:34:07 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 3/18/2011
Posts: 12,069
Location: Kianjokoma
Let her know you dont like her attitude. Make it gentle but if she doesnt cool off, report the dispute to her superiors.
Laughing out loudly smile Applause d'oh! Sad Drool Liar Shame on you Pray
Ondiek
#8 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 9:36:41 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 6/21/2009
Posts: 292
Watch "Horrible Bosses" you might get an idea on what to do.
Cardinal
#9 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 9:37:15 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 5/12/2009
Posts: 266
If she is a muhindi run and dont look back
StatMeister
#10 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 9:43:12 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 5/23/2010
Posts: 868
Location: La Islas Galápagos
Jus Blazin wrote:
segemia wrote:
@ blackcobra

When such situations arise as they do too often, try to get her by any means possible..And then jaribu "kupiga yeye kijiti". Things will be very smooth thereafter.

Na kama blackcobra ni mamasita?


Kama ako na dreamliner, inaitwa landing, kama ni mamasita, sasa sijui, labda ni airport merger
A bad day fishing is better than a good day at work
mnjoro
#11 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 10:16:51 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 2/21/2009
Posts: 573
blackcobra wrote:
Sometimes i am tempted to give my boss a piece of my mind.... or give her a smack on her face.

This is someone who enjoys belittling me in front of everyone... maybe to show that i am her project.
I approach her when i was in another department and requested that we start a new department .. n since she s influential in the organization, she moved with zeal and within no time the department had been established.
Now it looks like i have to lick her boots the rest of my life.
She keeps reminding me that i will be transferred, or taken back to where i was... yet she cant proof why.
God..... im breaking now!!! Some advises from wazuas?

Get lost where is your manhood.If its too much land on her Wangu Wa Makeri style
panomaz
#12 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 11:01:40 AM
Rank: New-farer


Joined: 8/18/2011
Posts: 85
Ondiek wrote:
Watch "Horrible Bosses" you might get an idea on what to do.


Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
Don't limit your challenges, but challenge your limits
Jus Blazin
#13 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 11:12:17 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 10/23/2008
Posts: 3,966
mnjoro wrote:
blackcobra wrote:
Sometimes i am tempted to give my boss a piece of my mind.... or give her a smack on her face.

This is someone who enjoys belittling me in front of everyone... maybe to show that i am her project.
I approach her when i was in another department and requested that we start a new department .. n since she s influential in the organization, she moved with zeal and within no time the department had been established.
Now it looks like i have to lick her boots the rest of my life.
She keeps reminding me that i will be transferred, or taken back to where i was... yet she cant proof why.
God..... im breaking now!!! Some advises from wazuas?

Get lost where is your manhood.If its too much land on her Wangu Wa Makeri style

Come srowry, labda ni airport.
Luck is when Preparation meets Opportunity. ~ Lucius Annaeus Seneca
Kaka M
#14 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 11:30:14 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 4/18/2011
Posts: 459
Pole sana @ black~. Now that the department was your brainchild, it seems your boss feels like u may take her place or u may not respect her as a boss etc etc. What other reason could be making her insecure? Are you more qualified than her? Are u about to get the bigger qualification? Are you a born leader whom other people just find them selves following yet the boss has to demand respect? Or will your presence, work, efforts be noticed no matter how someone hides them?
Whatever the case thats just you and no matter what u will remain. "A city built on a hill cannot be hidden."

A number of bosses reject suggestions from superiors then after a while introduce the same ideas but with their own slight modifications which is justifiable depending on how you look at it. That way they can claim credit for the ideas.

If your boss has specifically talked about transfering you to another department, would it be so bad if she did? Maybe you could talk to the head of the other department to inform u when there is a chance. I believe that as long as you are in the same organisation the departments have generally not so much difference.
For the time being try to lie low, give your boss all the respect that is due to her.
Like the waswahili say "Heshimu mjinga uepuke balaa."
Also don't think so much about your boss, that organisation may be there long after you have left. What will matter then is what you did for yourself when you were there. That does not mean you get careless with your work though. Although the best alafu ubadilishe hiyo jina. The first time a human talked to a snake they would soon realise they were naked and life has never been the same since.
Thiong'o
#15 Posted : Friday, November 04, 2011 12:07:56 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 10/14/2011
Posts: 661
blackcobra wrote:
Sometimes i am tempted to give my boss a piece of my mind.... or give her a smack on her face.

This is someone who enjoys belittling me in front of everyone... maybe to show that i am her project.
I approach her when i was in another department and requested that we start a new department .. n since she s influential in the organization, she moved with zeal and within no time the department had been established.
Now it looks like i have to lick her boots the rest of my life.
She keeps reminding me that i will be transferred, or taken back to where i was... yet she cant proof why.
God..... im breaking now!!! Some advises from wazuas?



Can any of these be helpful ….?

The 48 Laws of Power

Law 21
Play a Sucker to Catch a Sucker – Seem Dumber than your Mark

No one likes feeling stupider than the next person. The trick is to make your victim feel smart – and not just smart, but smarter than you are. Once convinced of this, they will never suspect that you may have ulterior motives

Law 22
Use the Surrender tactic: Transform weakness into power

When you are weaker, never fight for honor’s sake; choose surrender instead. Surrender gives you time to recover, time to toment and irritate your conqueror, time to wait for his power to wane. Do not give him the satisfaction of fighting and defeating you –surrender first. By turning the other check you infuriate and unsettle him. Make surrender a tool of power.

Law 26
Keep your Hands Clean.

You must seem a paragon of civility and efficiency; your hands are never soiled by mistakes and nasty deeds. Maintain such a spotless appearance by using others as scapegoats and cats’s –pawns to disguise your involvement.

Law 30.
Make you accomplishments seem effortless

Your actions must seam effortless and executed with ease. All the toil and practice that go into them, and also all the clever tricks, must be concealed. When you act, act effortlessly, as if you could do much more. Avoid the temptations of revealing how hard you work- it only raises questions. Teach no one your tricks or they will be used against you.

Law 31
Control the options: Get others to play with the cards you deal.

The best deceptions are the ones that seem to give the other person a choice. Your victims feel they are in control, but are actually your puppets. Give people options that come out in your favor whichever one they chose. Force them to make choices between the lesser of the two evils, both of which serve your purpose. Put them on the horns of your dilemma; they are gored wherever they turn.

Law 33
Discover each Man's Thumbscrew

Everyone has a weakness, a gap in the castle wall. That weakness is usually an insecurity, an uncontrollable emotion or need; it can also be small secret pleasure. Either way, once found, it is a thumbscrew you can turn to your advantage.

Law 35
Master the art of timing

Never seem to be in hurry- hurrying betrays a lack of control over yourself, and overtime, always seem inpatient, as if you know that everything will come to you eventually. Became a detective of the right moment; sniff out the spirit of the times, the trend that will carry you top power. Learn to stand back when time is not yet ripe, and to strike fiercely when it has reached fruition.

Law 36
Disdain things you cannot have; ignoring them is the best revenge

By acknowledging petty problem you give it existence and credibility. The more attention you pay an enemy the stronger you make him, and a small mistake is often made worse and more visible when you try to fix it. It’s sometimes best to leave things alone. If there is something you want but you cannot have, show contempt for it. The less interest you reveal, the more superior you seem.

Law 38
Think as you like but behave like others

If you make a show of going against the times, flaunting your unconventional ideas and unorthodox ways, people will think that only want attention and that you look down upon them. They will find a way to punish you for making them feel inferior. It is far safer to blend in and nurture the common touch. Share your originality only with tolerant friends and those who are sure to appreciate your uniqueness

Law 40
Despise the free lunch

What is offered for free is dangerous – it usually involves either a trick or a hidden obligation. What has worth is worth paying for. By paying your own way you stay clear of gratitude, guilt, and deceit. It is often wise to pay the full price – there is no cutting corners with excellence. Be lavish with your money and keep it circulating, for generosity is a sign of magnet power.

Law 41
Avoid stepping into great man’s shoes

What happens first always appears better and more original than what comes after. If you succeed a great man or have a famous parent, you will have to accomplish double their achievements to outshine them. Do not get lost in their shadow , or stuck in past not of your own making: Establish your own name and identity by changing course. Slay the overbearing father, disparage his legacy, and gain power by shining in your own way.

Law 44
Disarm and infuriate with mirror effect

The mirror effect reflects reality, but it is also the perfect tool for deception: when you mirror your enemies, doing exactly as they do, they cannot figure out your strategy. The mirror effect mocks and humiliates them, making them overreact. By holding mirror on their psyches, you seduce them with the illusion that you share their values; by holding a mirror to their actions, you teach them a lesson. Few can resist the power of mirror effect.

Law 45
Preach the need for change, but never reform too much at once.

Everyone …….

Law 46
Never appear too perfect

Appearing better than others is always dangerous, but most dangerous of all is to appear to have no faults or weakness. Envy creates silent enemies. Its smart to occasionally display defects, an admit to harmless vices, in order to deflect envy and appear more human and approachable. Only gods and the dead can seem perfect with impunity.

Law 47
Do not go past the mark you aimed for; in victory, learn when to stop.
The moment of victory is often the moment of greatest peril. In the heat of victory, arrogance and overconfidence can push you past the goal you had aimed for, and by going too far, you make more enemies than you defeat. Do not allow success go to your head. There is no substitute for strategy and careful planning. Set a goal, and when you reach it, stop.

Law 48
Assume Formlessness

By taking shape, by having visible plan, you open yourself to attack. Instead of taking a form for your enemy to grasp, keep yourself adaptable and on the move. Accept the fact that nothing is certain and no law is fixed . the best way to protect yourself is to be as fluid and formless as water; never bet on stability or lasting order. Everything changes.



blackcobra
#16 Posted : Monday, November 07, 2011 1:21:26 PM
Rank: New-farer


Joined: 1/7/2010
Posts: 68
Location: kenya
Thanks all for the bright ideas. First things first...
1. I am a woman and my boss s a woman
2. I have tried talking to her politely, but what i get is rudeness/ insults
3. I will need like the next 7yrs to get the qualifications she has.... so i cant get her job now.
4. Reporting her to her superiors may backfire and instead tarnish my name..... Bosses will talk at their level.
5. She is not worth any rudeness.... nor fight from me... i cant stoop that low. Maybe she wants to push me to the wall and see how far i can get.
6. She keeps reminding that the senior boss is saying that i do not work. I know the senior boss too well to know that's a lie... he can communicate to me directly.
...
....
...

I am left with 1 option... avoiding her completely, including not attending any meetings which she s in......

Outcome: the operations are paralyzed!!!!

God just needs to come personally before i lose it all!!!!
sparkly
#17 Posted : Monday, November 07, 2011 1:52:40 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 9/23/2009
Posts: 8,083
Location: Enk are Nyirobi
@nyokanyeusi these looks like problems of your own making. Why should you be dragged into beef with your colleagues? Does she pay your salary? Can she fire you? Are you not qualified for your position? If the answer to these questions is NO, then you need to stop reacting to her actions. Be clear in your objectives on what you want from the current employment and how you want to improve yourself. Be professional and communicate with her candidly. Ignore petty talk and office politics. Seek opportunities to help her out. Ask for her help if you need it. If she doesn't co-operate its her problem not yours.
Life is short. Live passionately.
Oaks
#18 Posted : Monday, November 07, 2011 2:42:38 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 1/22/2008
Posts: 45
@blackcobra, pole sana. I feel you. Was in the same situation. Whatever you do, the few shortcomings are what will be highlighted, even 2 years after. always trying to down play any achievements. Up to know I have never understood nor has anybody else, reasons for that.
Kaka M
#19 Posted : Monday, November 07, 2011 3:18:10 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 4/18/2011
Posts: 459
Now that you are both ladies, and you are not likely to be more qualified that your boss, the problem is either, she ain't happy that it was your idea to create a department. This is not likely though. The most likely reasons are the looks department.
R you hotter than your boss in terms of looks,hair legs etc? If yes thats the problems.
If not then you jamaa colleagues r friendly with you and not with her. Ama umeget attention ya someone who used to give attention to her?
Thirdly, maybe you are being picked and dropped by a hubby/ boyfie who has a bigger car than hers or her hubby's. Or he is so hot so she is envious.
Or r you driving a bigger car yourself?
If its jealous coming out of things different from work you maybe better off going to the older department.
But try your best with your job, and keep the boss in the know periodically and work hard to be the best.
Wish u all the best.




Kwanini
#20 Posted : Monday, November 07, 2011 3:30:41 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 1/28/2009
Posts: 353
Location: Cloud
Kaka M wrote:
..... The most likely reasons are the looks department.
R you hotter than your boss in terms of looks,hair legs e......
Or r you driving a bigger car yourself? ....
smile





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