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My child down the wrong path?
JkMwatha
#1 Posted : Tuesday, May 12, 2009 7:41:00 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 9/11/2007
Posts: 816
We love our kids and want the best for them. In doing so,we provide the best education (finances permitting),ensure they get to Uni... 1st degree.. then Masters... and probably even more schooling.... so as to secure good professions when they're done...

Scientist,physicians,Lawyer,top accountants,management execs etc

Throughout their 'growing years' they have been encouraged to 'work hard,get a good stable job,hence retire with a good pension'

In doing this don't we discourage them from becoming entrepreneurs?

If you ask any child 'What would you like to be when you grow up?' What are the chances that his/her answer will be 'An entrepreneur' or 'Business owner' ?

My son says he wants to be 'An Investment Banker'...... May be its good as it compliments any 'entrepreneurial upbringing' I may have nurtured in him.

Some say it is safer being a Lawyer/Doctor/Scientist as these tend to favour longer careers.....

Help me out on this

One scenario

Your child (aged 10-13) when asked by an uncle/aunt/relative what he would like from them for his birthday... he says money as opposed to a gift.

another scenario

Suppose, by the time your child finishes school with good results and goes to University but his/her interest in biashara (buying & selling a few things) begins to interfere with his studies and s/he suggests to you that s/he puts off Uni for a year or two to pursue the interest ...... (not that there is much money being made)..

How would you respond?




Motobex.
JkMwatha
#2 Posted : Tuesday, May 12, 2009 7:44:00 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 9/11/2007
Posts: 816
We love our kids and want the best for them. In doing so,we provide the best education (finances permitting),ensure they get to Uni... 1st degree.. then Masters... and probably even more schooling.... so as to secure good professions when they're done...

Scientist,physicians,Lawyer,top accountants,management execs etc

Throughout their 'growing years' they have been encouraged to 'work hard,get a good stable job,hence retire with a good pension'

In doing this don't we discourage them from becoming entrepreneurs?

If you ask any child 'What would you like to be when you grow up?' What are the chances that his/her answer will be 'An entrepreneur' or 'Business owner' ?

My son says he wants to be 'An Investment Banker'...... May be its good as it compliments any 'entrepreneurial upbringing' I may have nurtured in him.

Some say it is safer being a Lawyer/Doctor/Scientist as these tend to favour longer careers.....

Help me out on this

One scenario

Your child (aged 10-13) when asked by an uncle/aunt/relative what he would like from them for his birthday... he says money as opposed to a gift.

another scenario

Suppose,by the time your child finishes school with good results and goes to University but his/her interest in biashara (buying & selling a few things) begins to interfere with his studies and s/he suggests to you that s/he puts off Uni for a year or two to pursue the interest ...... (not that there is much money being made)..

How would you respond?





Motobex.
Obi 1 Kanobi
#3 Posted : Tuesday, May 12, 2009 8:12:00 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/23/2008
Posts: 3,017
@JKMwatha,so you got a son.

First a 13 year old asking for cash instead of a gift is not a good thing,it doesn't feel right especially if its relatives.

As for college or business,parents would normally want their children to complete college before venturing into life and they are very right. Experience has proved that the 3-4 years spent in college improves returns post college manyfolds. But teens may not see it this way.

A parent should gauge the seriousness of their childs desire to pursue business,example trying to see if the business venture is viable and talking over it with the child,discussing what sought of capital they have etc,in this way you are able to help them make the right choices,unlike the traditional method of yelling,withdrawing allowances and banning them from your house.


I guess if you can't win with facts,you can always pen bile-laced,xenophobic rants to distract everyone.
"The purpose of bureaucracy is to compensate for incompetence and lack of discipline." James Collins
brav
#4 Posted : Tuesday, May 12, 2009 8:41:00 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/26/2008
Posts: 745

Wow!!! kwani who are you?

Coz we had the same same discussion jana kwa pub (WHAT!!! yeah i was in a pub jana monday,I was meeting a client jeez people !!!)

And we looked at different scenarios,and what amazed me is that,guys agreed that if they would have been given another chance they all wouldnt have 'abandoned' their enterpreneurial skills for the sake of education.

one dude used to sell scratch cards at campo,those days and he was the 'main supplier' until he went to third year. now being in IT he feels he would have pursued enterpreneurial 'calling'.

Another case is my classmate dropped in second year went into business,selling IT equips,now he's shops are scattered all over the country,I was employed by him during one of the vacations.

From my knowledge

Scenario One: I would make sure that he starts saving,with that money he/she deposits it HIM/HERSELF to a bank or in a piggy bank.

Scenario Two: Surprise Surprise I would back him or her up.

DO IT!!



Usichoke kutafuta salary
Mkimwa
#5 Posted : Tuesday, May 12, 2009 1:53:00 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 10/26/2008
Posts: 380
Scenerio 2..

Do the business at the same time concentrate on the schooling. i think its possible to manage both,if someone has the discipline.. I did it.
Kusadikika
#6 Posted : Tuesday, May 12, 2009 1:55:00 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/22/2008
Posts: 2,702
Now bringing up children is a very tricky business. Even as no one can question the nobility of your intentions for your child the truth is no one knows what the future holds for him on any career path he choses to take. There are people who drop out of Medical school,there are economically successful miserable doctors,there are lawyers with all in the world who commit suicide. Adriano one of the best and probably in a clique of some of the highest paid footballers ever,wants to take a break from football because it no longer makes him happy.

I guess what am getting at is,life is a journey and not a destination and the best you can do for your child is help him find what journey he wants to take and equip him with the tools to stay the course and find his place in the world. The final decision is his. Ask more questions than you give answers. I was once in room with an inquisitive five year old who kept asking his dad questions. What is that? What is that for? etc. What I found really smart is the dad never actually gave his son any answers instead he kept answering with questions. What do you think it is? Take a guess? Could it possibly be... After a little banter the kid finally discovered the answer for himself. Let the child do more of the talking while you ask guiding questions to help him discover more of himself and what he wants to do. Be prepared for him to change his mind a million times but he will finally find his way,his own as unique as his fingerprints. This takes a lot of time. Spend time with him,lots of time,give him exposure,discuss things you find interesting with him,share your reading eg. there is really this interesting article on the National Geographic about heart disease or polar bears or emerging china,tell me what you think about it. There is a window period which parents must seize or is lost forever to puberty after which dialogue becomes difficult.
My two cents

Weusi wa nywele za mshtakiwa zaonyesha ujinga alio nao
bwenyenye
#7 Posted : Tuesday, May 12, 2009 2:42:00 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 5/24/2007
Posts: 1,805
Good people,

@ JKM,the good book says,' bring up a child in the way that HE should go,and when he gows up,he will not depart from it.'

The toughest thing is finding the kid's path and not what we think is the path. Business is good,very good but I think real entrepreneurs excell because Cash is not the end in itself for them but just a card in the game. The business game is the end. If you think that your kid loves this game,then by all means educate him as much as you can but guide him in the path that he should go. As fathers,I think this is our biggest dilemma : to reckon that each child has their path and guide them in it irrespective of our feelings. But then again how can we know what our kid's path is if we do not spend time with them? I a child finds his path and follows it,HE WILL DEFINITELY PROSPER . One of my greatest old age 'phobias' is not losing my wealth as much as it is losing my son's/ daughter's dream as well by not getting their path right.. because then,other than my soul,I have lost it ALL
I Think Therefore I Am
Brewer
#8 Posted : Tuesday, May 12, 2009 4:10:00 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 6/24/2008
Posts: 238
Gosh,am a father and I doubt I have found my path. The only wisdom on the path to life I am able to share without fear of contradiction is: LIFE IS NOT A STRAIGHT LINE.
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